


A Warm Bed

by rotg5311



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-04-23 03:56:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 25,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14324043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rotg5311/pseuds/rotg5311
Summary: A BuckyxTony fic. Takes place after Civil War and Infinity War never happens because its my story, I can pretend like no one will die and that everyone will be happy forever.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I dont own Avengers (obviously). Any questions comments concerns suggestions please leave in a comment, thank you.

The first time Tony stumbled into Bucky’s bed, he was absolutely shitfaced. An arm slammed around Bucky’s waist jolting him awake as a wave of liquor hit his nostrils. Before his fight or flight response could kick in he realized it was Tony and was too shocked to say anything. So he didn’t. He just tensed up and waited. But nothing happened. A soft snoring sound came from the other mans lips. Not really a snore per say, that was too harsh of a word to describe the delicate noise coming from inches away. So close, Bucky could feel warm breath on his cheek. The scent of alcohol was so overwhelming, but he didn’t dare move.  
Since Steve and Tony had made up, Bucky was walking on eggshells. He finally had his best friend back, a place to live at the Avenger compound, and new companions. And he really didn’t want to ruin any of that by overstepping his boundaries with Tony. By which he meant interacting with Tony at all. In the few months he’d been living under the same roof as the other man they’d barley spoken twenty words to each other. It was mostly ‘Yes’, ‘No’, ‘I don’t know’, or ‘They’re training’. Sometimes if Bucky said something funny to someone else around Tony, the other man would even crack a little smile before hiding it behind his coffee cup.  
Steve told him that Tony knew the Winter Soldier was to blame for Howard and Maria’s death, and not Bucky, but that he also couldn’t get over it yet. Maybe it would take time, maybe it was something Tony could never get past. Bucky understood that, so he kept his distance. So when he woke up to a bed full of Tony, he just let it happen, not wanting to make things more awkward. Before becoming the Winter Soldier, Bucky occasionally had a little too much to drink and ended up in some weird places in the morning. Now alcohol didn’t have the same affect, his metabolism burned through it too fast. Tony probably just mistook this room for his own and crawled into bed. Bucky was prepared to act like it never happened, so he went back to sleep. And if anyone saw, he’d tell them his arm must’ve wrapped around Tony’s smaller frame after he fell back asleep, no one needed to know holding the other man put him to sleep faster than anything else in years.  
The next morning Bucky woke up first and just watched Tony sleep for a few minutes. Through out the night Tony had sprawled out in bed like an animal. Hair stuck out at odd angles, a fistful of blankets, and mouth slightly parted. Bucky couldn’t help but think how serene he looked liked that. Silently sliding out of bed, he got on with his regular morning routine. Shower, brush teeth, do hair, get dressed, have breakfast, report to Steve. From there Steve decided how they’d train that day. The Avengers hadn’t declared Bucky fit for duty yet, still unsure about how the Winter Soldier effected him. They were right, until they could get all that out of his head, he was still a hazard out in the field. So Bucky trained with everyone in the meantime.  
After a few hours with Steve, Bucky needed another shower. It was always a contest between the two of them, seeing who could outdo the other. Bucky loved it. Before the serum, Steve could never keep up with him, now they were finally equals. He was so deep in thought he almost forgot about Tony. Nervously he opened his bedroom door, only to find an empty bed. He sighed in relief, glad he didn’t catch Tony while he was waking up. Ignoring the little pang he felt in his chest, he hopped back in the shower, thinking of everything and anything that had nothing to do with Tony.


	2. Chapter 2

For days Bucky didn’t see Tony at all. It wasn’t all that uncommon, sometimes when Tony got caught up in a project, he’d lock himself away in his lab and work until it was finished. However this time it felt a little more personal. So Bucky decided he didn’t need to mention it to anyone, and he definitely didn’t need to bring it up with Tony any time soon. Or any time at all for that matter. He over heard Bruce telling Vision that he had to force Tony to take a break and eat, he didn’t look good. Without trying to seem too nosey, he managed to pick up on some other details. Apparently Pepper left Tony for good this time, which shed been doing on and off for years. Bucky thought that might’ve been why Tony had drank so much the other night.  
He didn’t expect to wake up to a bed full of Tony again that night. The same as a few nights before, the other man had slammed himself down near Bucky, closer this time. Unlike the first timme, Tony managed to stay awake long enough to stare Bucky down for what felt like an eternity before his grip on Bucky’s waist tightened and he drifted off to sleep. Or passed out. Bucky wasn’t sure how much Tony had been drinking, or how his body handled that much alcohol. Also unlike the other night, he stayed awake for a long time just watching the smaller man. Listening to his breathing in the silence of the compound. Maybe the walls were sound proof, it was always quiet in his bedroom. Eventually the steady sound of Tony breathing helped him drift off to sleep.  
Just like the last time, Bucky was up first, with the sun. When he checked his room around Noon, it was empty again. So he didn’t expect anything different this time around. And for a while it wasn’t different. He didn’t see Tony, and he didn’t go looking for him. Just when he thought things would go back to normal, it happened again. And again, and again, until it became routine. A strange secret routine. Every few nights Tony would stumble into his room, reeking of alcohol, and curl up in bed with him. They never said anything, and as far as Bucky was concerned, they didn’t have to. Maybe it was selfish to not talk about it while Tony was sober, but he hadn’t gotten such a good nights sleep in a very long time, and he wasn’t ready to give it up just yet. Bucky hadn’t figured out what Tony got out of their little sleeping arrangement, but deep down he wasn’t sure he wanted to know.  
One time Bucky woke up from a nightmare. Sometimes he got them, although they happened less and less frequently thankfully. The Winter Soldier still haunted him, and he wasn’t sure that would ever leave him. Drenched in sweat, heart thumping out of his chest, he reached over and turned on the lamp by his bed. As he was running his hand through his hair, the door opened and Tony walked in, taking a good few steps before he realized Bucky was awake. They stared at each other like deer caught in each others headlights. Bucky always assumed Tony just ended up in the wrong room on his drinking nights. Hell, he wasn’t even sure Tony didn’t fall into the other Avengers beds on accident from time to time also. When Tony didn’t bolt off out of the room like Bucky expected, he just told him “Nightmare” in a gruff voice.  
That seemed to be a good enough answer for Tony because he slowly made his way to the bed, like the ground would fall out from under his feet, which had to be from all the liquor, clicked off the lamp and climbed into bed. When Bucky didn’t lay down right away, Tony grabbed him and pulled him into a laying position. Only this time he made Bucky the little spoon. Bucky calmed down fairly fast after that, drifting off to sleep without hearing Tony’s quiet snores.  
Waking up a little later than usual, Bucky realized he was still the little spoon. He also realized Tony had his morning wood pressed up against his ass. Bucky’s cheeks flushed in embarrassment. Then reddened more when he realized he wasn’t in a rush to move away from it. He gave the other mans cock a little nudge with his ass tentatively, freezing when he heard a quiet moan. Nothing happened. Slowly sliding out of bed, he started his day.  
Steve beat him at everything that morning and tried following him up to his room to talk to him. He was Bucky’s best friend, and he knew something was off. However he also knew Bucky wouldn’t talk until he was ready, so Steve left him alone after awhile. He wasn’t ready to talk yet. Not until he knew what he was feeling. Bucky was so deep in thought that he almost jumped when he opened his bedroom door and saw Tony still fast asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

As fast and quietly as he possibly could, which wasn’t hard for an assassin, Bucky turned around and left the room and the sleeping man inside it. Tony had always been gone by the time Bucky returned. It was part of their silent agreement. And since Bucky wasn’t ready to talk about it, he couldn’t risk being there when Tony woke up. So he ran. After a while he ended up in the kitchen. It was lunch time after all. Natasha sat at the table, a Starkpad in one hand, a fork in the other, and a plate of something scary and healthy in front of her. Bruce stood behind the counter, grabbing himself a plate of whatever it was.  
“Help yourself. I made some-” Bruce started before Bucky cut him off.  
“Don’t tell me.” He grimaced. “It looks healthy, but I’ll only eat it if you don’t tell me what’s in it. It’s easier if I don’t know.”  
“Picky huh?” Natasha said, not looking up from her Starkpad.  
“Its ok,” Bruce answered for him with a wink. “ Green is scary for some people.”  
Bucky and Natasha laughed at that. Bruce was usually quiet, but he had a sense of humor when he wanted to bless someone with it. And surprisingly enough, the mush in front of him was pretty good, as long as he didn’t look at it. They made small chit chat for a while, talking about nothing in particular. And it was good, until he choked on his drink when Tony strolled into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. No one said anything, they all just stared. Tony hadn’t crawled out of his lab in weeks.  
“A picture would last longer” Tony said without turning around. “But its not as good as the real thing.”  
“Easier to throw darts at though” Natasha told him, a hint of a smile at her lips.  
Tony turned around and leaned up against the counter, slowly sipping at his black coffee. His face turned immediately sour when he saw the goop on our plates. “What is that? Is it going to crawl off the plate?”  
“Don’t be ridiculous” Bruce told him, “It cant crawl. There’s no meat.”  
“No meat? Not food. Everyone knows meat makes a meal.”  
“That’s not right. That’s wrong. Broaden your horizons. Even Bucky tried it, he likes it, and he’s almost as picky as you.”  
“Is that true?” Tony asked, and Bucky almost sputtered. So he just nodded back at him. “Guess it couldn’t kill me. Probably.”  
Tony smiled and tried the smallest spoonful of food out of the pan. He made a face like he was contemplating it, then chugged a mouthful of coffee.  
“It would be better with meat. But not bad Brucie. I‘ll give it a solid 6/10. You should be honored.” Tony told him as he walked over to the table, sitting right next to Bucky.  
Bucky felt his heart thumping just a little faster. Unsure of what to do he slowly kept nibbling at his food, staying out of the conversation unless directly spoken too, and even then it was yes or no answers. After a while he excused himself and left to go for another run. Maybe he was just over thinking things. Tony barley talked to him that day. It didn’t mean anything. So what if it was more of a conversation than they’ve ever had before. So what if they’ve been sleeping in bed together for weeks. So what if the only time Bucky could sleep well was with Tony in his arms. For now, Bucky just wanted to shove all the So What Ifs deep deep down and ignore them, it would make life so much easier.  
With not much else to do, he cleaned up and went to see Steve. They tried to hang out a few times a week, like they did before the war. Usually they tried catching up on things together. New movies, songs, games, and everything in between. It was better that way, experiencing something for the first time with someone, without others there to judge. Neither of them had to worry about asking a ‘silly’ question if it was just the two of them. They usually had Friday pick out a movie for them, always making sure it was randomized and something they hadn’t seen before. Shoveling popcorn in their faces, they stayed up later than usual just enjoying each others company. Making up for years of lost time.  
Sometime in the early morning, Bucky headed off to his room after dozing off next to Steve on his couch. He opened his door and got undressed before realizing there was already someone in the bed. Tony. Maybe Bucky would ask someone how Tony was handling the breakup with Pepper. Maybe he should get Tony some help. How messed up did you have to be to crawl in bed with a man you hate almost every night, with a higher than legal blood alcohol content.  
As Bucky crawled in behind the other man, curling around his body, he shivered as he heard a slight groan escape Tony’s mouth, followed by a barley audible “Bucky.”


	4. Chapter 4

That was the night everything changed. His name on Tony’s lips sent blood rushing straight to his cock. It took everything he had not to press it onto the other man body, so close to his. But he had too much respect for that. Consent was important. It was everything. And Tony was drunk. And asleep. It wouldn’t be right to do anything for his own pleasure right now. Even if he wanted to. And he REALLY wanted to. So he rolled over to the other side and eventually went to sleep.  
What he couldn’t have in real life, he got in his dream. Tony crying out his name. Warm bodies tangled together. Bucky woke up with a sticky spot in his boxers and a blush across his cheeks. After a shower, his day went like the one before. Tony was out and about. And they talked just a little bit more. Nothing in particular, and always with someone else in the room. Bucky could barely focus. He felt dirty. Tony and Vision were talking about something sciency with Bruce and all he could think about was bending Tony over the desk and fucking him until he screamed his name.  
With that thought he knew he had to leave the room, so he did. It was wrong. Sure it was a different time that when he grew up, he had seen plenty of men with men. As far as he knew, a lot of people were ok with it now. And he had tried a thing or two with some men and women before, and during, the war. But this was Tony Stark. And The Winter Soldier killed Tony’s parents and that meant all these things he was feeling were wrong….Right?  
It was all too much. Maybe he needed to tell Tony to stop coming in his room at night. But he didn’t really want to do that. Maybe he would just start locking the door so Tony couldn’t get in. He also didn’t want to do that either. Maybe it was selfish of him to want the other man in his bed at night. Every night. Tony clearly needed help. Bucky just wasn’t strong enough to let him go. He had found a treasure, and he was going to keep it hidden for as long as he could.  
Day after day Tony talked to Bucky more. Or talked at Bucky was more like it, since he just wanted to sit there and listen to the other mans voice. Until one day Bucky was talking to him about vintage motorcycles and cars. Tony brought him to the garage after that and set Bucky free to find one to fix up. He found a heap of what used to be a motorcycle in the corner. Tony tried talking him into something better, but Bucky knew that was the one he wanted to fix up.  
“She’ll be real pretty once I fix her up. Then you’ll have something nice to ride around.” Bucky told him.  
“Excuse you.” Tony whipped around and raised his eyebrows at the taller man. “There’s not a single thing that I would ride that’s ugly”  
The dirty voice in Bucky’s head said ‘You can ride me, Doll, I’m cute.’ But he shoved that thought back down as Tony added, “Besides, if you can fix it, you can have it. I wasn’t using it anyways.”  
So Bucky made a list of parts he needed for his bike and Tony ordered them. And Bucky was happy.  
Once Steve caught on to the budding friendship between Bucky and Tony, he was over the moon. He felt guilty about lying to Tony about what happened to Howard and Maria. At first he tried to force a friendship on them, but Tony wasn’t having any of that. So now that it was happening on its own, it was like a weight had been lifted off Steve’s shoulders.  
“Buck. I’m happy you two are finally getting along.” Steve said, handing a bowl of popcorn to Bucky as he sat down on the couch next to him. “I told you he just needed time. You know, to realize it wasnt you.”  
“Yeah.” Bucky didn’t want to talk about that. The Winter Soldier killed the Stark’s. And Bucky was the Winter Soldier. “Do you know what happened to his Girl, Pepper?”  
“I guess she finally had enough. It’s a lot to deal with, watching someone you love, always in danger.” Bucky knew the feeling. Years of caring for a sickly Steve, then watching him fight in the War. Steve was a brother to him in every way but blood. He loved him like family, and it was hard constantly worrying about him. “They’ve been on and off for a while now. But I’ve never seen him like this. I think it’s for good this time.”  
“He’s been drinking a lot huh?” Bucky said before he could stop himself. He shouldn’t have known that. Tony hadn’t been wandering around drunk, just wandering to him drunk.  
“You can smell it on him too? The serum. Heightens your senses.” Steve was telling him as he scrolled through Friday’s lists of movies for the night. “Bruce had to put him to bed a couple nights. Went to check on him, and he’s just gone. Friday wouldn’t tell him where Tony went. But he always comes back in one piece. So, keep an eye on him if you see him somewhere he shouldn’t be. Just until he gets the help he needs.”  
“Ok, Stevie. I can do that.” He promised. He would watch out for Tony. He always would.


	5. Chapter 5

The first time Tony showed up sober, Bucky thought he was dreaming it. He came in and laid down slightly hesitant. Before Bucky realized something was off, he already had his right arm wrapped around Tony’s waist, pulling him flush against his own body. Bucky’s heart thrummed in his chest as he sniffed for the scent of alcohol he had grown accustomed to. If Tony hadn’t been drinking, then why was he there? Bucky waited, afraid to move, afraid that if he did Tony would bolt out the door. But he didn’t. He relaxed into Bucky’s body, placing a hand over the arm across his waist. It took Bucky a very long time to fall asleep that night. So afraid Tony would realize where he was and run away, even after it was apparent he had fallen asleep still clinging to Bucky’s arm.  
When he woke up, Tony was gone. If he had been standing, he would’ve fallen out of pure shock, Tony never woke up that early. So he rolled over and closed his eyes when he heard the bathroom door open. Tony was still there. Bucky decided it would be better if he just pretended he was still asleep. Then they could keep up their little game of pretend,, acting like they didn’t share a bed most nights. To his surprise, Tony crawled into the bed behind him and curled into his back. He was sure Tony could feel his heart leaping from his chest, but they both pretended he was still asleep anyways.  
The next time he woke up his Starkphone was buzzing. A call from Steve, that he sent to voicemail. Looking at his phone he saw that he had two more missed calls and five texts.  
‘Hey Buck, did you sleep in?’  
‘Bucky? Are you up?’  
‘If you want to cancel on me, you could give me a notice…’  
‘Don’t make me come drag you out of bed.’  
‘Ok here I come. Hope you don’t sleep BUCK naked. :D’

Bucky was about to text Steve back for the horrible pun when he heard a knock on the door and froze. Steve called his name from the other side.  
“Don’t come in, I cant find any pants.” He yelled, waking Tony, who started to open his mouth to speak. Bucky clamped his metal hand over the other mans mouth. Then, without thinking, he leaned in to whisper in the other mans ear, ignoring the shiver that ran down his spine. “Steve’s outside for me, please go hide in the bathroom.”  
Tony rolled his eyes so hard Bucky thought they would roll out of his head, but crawled silently out of bed, sporting morning wood unabashedly through his pajama bottoms. He slipped into the bathroom as Bucky went for the door to let Steve in.  
“Are you decent, Ma’am?” Steve said through a fit of giggles. He had been bugging Bucky to cut his hair for a while now.  
“Ha Ha very funny. Why are you dragging me out of my nice comfy bed?” Bucky asked, trying to keep the mood light, despite his panic on the inside. Steve almost caught him in bed with Tony, who was hiding in the bathroom. What was he supposed to do now that he had broken their silent pact to pretend none of this happened come morning time?  
“You missed training today. You feeling ok? You look a little red.” Steve reached out and touched Bucky’s forehead. “You feel a little warm. I thought super soldiers didn’t get sick.”  
“You’re the super soldier, not me. I’m just super good looking.” Bucky lied through his teeth, wanting Steve to go away so he could take care of his problem in the bathroom. Steve laughed at him and told him to get better and call him if he needs him. After Bucky promised he would, Steve left.  
Hesitantly, Bucky headed for the bathroom, but before he got there, the door swung open and Tony walked out.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys, i couldnt post a chapter until i thought it wasnt complete trash. BUt then it took too long, so here this is.

For a second Bucky had a foolish idea that maybe if he didn’t move, Tony wouldn’t see him. As if he were staring down some sort of dangerous animal. Luckily, the other man made the first move. Tony brushed past Bucky, not making eye contact, and headed for the door.  
“Well if you’re sick, I don’t want it.” Tony told him sharply, stepping through the door and closing it behind him, not giving Bucky a chance to reply. On one hand he was relieved that it had been as simple as that. Bucky didn’t know what to say to him, so he was glad Tony didn’t let him talk. But on the other hand there was a burning sensation in the pit of his stomach form the tone of his voice. Ignoring the crushing sensation in his chest, Bucky crawled back into bed. He knew that Tony wouldn’t be back after what happened.  
‘It’s for the best. Things can go back to normal now. You’ll be fine.’ The voice of reason chanted on repeat in his head. But what was normal? Hiding away at a compound for the rest of his life? Having little to no contact with other people? He didn’t realize he craved the touch of another person until Tony had given it to him. Now he didn’t know what he would do without that. Maybe he would just pray to whoever was out there that Tony would come stumbling into his arms again in time, drunk or not.  
But he didn’t. Night after night, Bucky waited. Alone. Every morning he would wake up. Alone. If Natasha noticed his sour mood during their training sessions, she didn’t let on. Which was a strong indicator that she probably suspected something was off, hopefully not knowing too much about the situation but he wouldn’t put that past her. Natasha was a skilled in many things, obtaining information was one of them. He knew it was only a matter of time before she or Steve tried getting information out of him. Forcefully or otherwise. So when Steve invited Natasha to their movie night, Bucky knew he had to watch out for any tricks they might pull on him. Natasha was a good friend and maybe it was time he talked to someone about what he felt towards Tony, so he could begin to understand the feelings himself. Hopefully she wouldn’t be as judgmental as he was afraid Steve might be.  
Bucky couldn’t think of a time when he had discussed homosexuality with Steve. It was one of the more taboo subjects of the time. Growing up they had only heard whispers of men with other men or women with women. They were regarded as sinners. It was supposed to be a shameful thing, so much so that families would cut contact with anyone even believed to be gay. He knew times had changed, but he didn’t know if Steve had. Somewhere along the way Bucky had lost his faith, but Steve didn’t. But they were family, even if it wasn’t through blood. Bucky had spent years of his life taking care of Steve before the war. They shared a brotherly bond that some true brothers never would. Would Steve throw all that away for what he thought was morally wrong? Bucky wasn’t sure. And wasn’t in the mood to find out any time soon.  
When he got to Steve’s room Natasha was already there, firmly planted on the reclining chair in the living room. She wore a plain blue dress, her wavy red hair falling over her shoulders. The dress was so simple yet she rocked it like a Goddess. He knew better than most that her killer looks could truly be deadly.  
“Natalia,” He said, sitting on the couch cushion closest to her chair.“Вы выглядите захватывающим.”  
“Hey, no Russian.” Steve pouted, walking from the kitchen, placing two bowls of snacks on the coffee table in front of them. “I need to know you guys aren’t making fun of me anymore than usual.”  
“Don’t worry Stevie. Its no fun trash talking you if you cant understand it.” Bucky said as he nudged Steve in the arm.  
After a very long and exhausting debate they settled on watching ‘Gerald’s Game.’ It was amazing. Before all this Hydra nonsense, Bucky had loved scary movies. While he wouldn’t exactly classify this movie as horror, it did have spooky elements and some slight gore. It built up a sense of dread throughout, and the special effects were much better than the practically nonexistent ones of his time. After the movie his two goon-ass friends decided to make their move.  
“So should we watch another movie or grab some tissues and cry with Bucky about his problems?” Natasha said as she gently placed an M&M in her mouth. “I did bring a box of Kleenex just for this.”  
“The only thing I want to cry over is how sinfully good this nacho cheese is.” Bucky told them matter-of-factly, hoping that would be the end of that conversation. Apparently it wasn’t his lucky night.  
“Come on Soldier,” Steve chuckled. “I can kick some ass for you if you need it.”  
“LANGUAGE!” Natasha screeched, making Steve turn red. After she told Bucky the story, he almost fell out of his chair. Steve always sworn like a sailor. Maybe it was something the army whipped out of him. God knows the 107th hadn’t done anything but expand his use of profanity. Now he knew swears in more languages than he could speak fluently.  
Luckily, that derailed onto other topics and Bucky escaped discussing his own problems, even if it was only for the night. He knew Natasha wouldn’t give up so easily, and he would tell her before she came to her own bad conclusions. But it could wait until another night. Tonight he just wanted to have a good time with his friends.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *ignores Infinity War harder*

So, maybe he was having too much fun. But it wasn’t really his fault. He wasn’t the one that weaseled a big bottle of thousand year old Asgardian liquor off of Thor. He wasn’t the one that poured the three of them glass after glass of drinks. It was Natasha. Therefore it was all Natasha’s fault. And Bucky wasn’t about to complain. It had been ages since he’d actually been able to get drunk, because of Hydra’s super soldier serum. And tonight he was hammered.  
Steve stumbled off to bed first, mumbling something about lock the door if you leave. Which wasn’t a necessity, sometimes Bucky crashed on the couch like he’d done growing up. Steve never cared, Bucky suspected he enjoyed the company. Natasha paced herself with Bucky a little better. In the red room they had given her their super soldier serum, which meant she could knock back these drinks as well as Steve and Bucky could.  
“You suck at poker” Natasha told him after she’d won the fifth time in a row.  
“Or maybe I’m just letting you win because I’m a gentleman.” He wasn’t, the numbers on the cards were just blurring together. Calling him out on his bluff, she stood up and grabbed his metal hand, pulling him to his feet. Bucky swayed in place and giggled. Things didn’t seem so bad when he couldn’t remember what he was even supposed to be upset about.  
“Come on big boy, I’ll walk you. Gotta get back to Bruce sometime tonight. Or this morning. Whatever time it is.”  
One arm slung around her shoulder, he let Natasha basically drag his drunk ass back to his room. Bucky was just enjoying the touch. It was comforting, almost Motherly. Too bad she would never get the chance for that kind of life. Caught up in just blissfully being held, he didn’t realize they were at his room until the door was in front of them. Only it wasn’t his room. They weren’t even in his hallway, When did that happen?  
“Tasha? This isn’t my-” He slowly started to say before she cut him off.  
“Но это то, где вам нужно быть. Trust me.” Bucky didn’t understand her smirk. He just kissed her cheek and stumbled through the door.  
With a hand on the wall, he made his way to the biggest bed he’d seen in his life. There was nothing more that he wanted than to lay in those fluffy sheets and sleep for another decade. Through the pale moonlight shinning through the curtains of a wall-length window, he saw a body laying in the bed. Tony. This was Tony’s room. Why did Natasha bring him here? How did she know? The better questioned was why did he think she wouldn’t find out. It was her job to know everything.  
He knew he should leave. Tony made it clear that whatever they had was over. But he looked so serene, sleep tousled hair, mouth slightly parted, moonlight caressing his body. Bucky couldn’t help it as he crawled into the bed, shoes and all, just to lay with Tony. To be close to him. It was a craving he couldn’t deny in this state of mind. He wished he could take a picture, just to make this moment last forever because he knew it would never happen again.  
Bucky reached out and laid a hand on Tony’s cheek. A brief flicker of fear shot through him as the other man woke up. He shouldn’t be here. And Tony shouldn’t be so damn cute. Before he realized what he was doing, he slammed his lips down onto Tony’s, catching whatever the other man had been about to say. The smaller man stiffened, and then relaxed, reaching up to run his fingers through Bucky’s hair. He trailed kisses along Tony’s jaw to his ear, enjoying the way his breathing changed.  
Tony looked like a snack. No. Tony was a full course meal, and Bucky was starving. It was a mess of kisses and nibbles, tongues fighting and hands grabbing. Bucky couldn’t get enough. He pulled Tony close, rutting against his leg. Tony moaned. It was music to Bucky’s ears, he wanted to hear it again. Over and over. He reached for Tony’s pajama bottoms and shoved a hand down them, grabbing his swollen cock.  
“Fuck” Tony sighed. It drove Bucky wild. His cock throbbed. He needed Tony.  
“Don’t mind if I do.” He told him, unzipping his pants, desperately trying to pull them off. They made it to his ankles before being stopped by the shoes he was still wearing. Good enough, Bucky was too drunk to fight his shoes off now. Next he was pulling off Tony’s pants, trailing kisses down his chest. Head spinning, Bucky lowered himself down between Tony‘s legs, letting their cocks touch. Beautiful. Tony reached a his hand down, gripping them both, making Bucky moan. His strokes were slow at first, teasing. Bucky bit down into the soft flesh of Tony’s shoulder, making sure it would bruise. His cocked leaked, or Tony’s, or both, making Tony’s hand slide along their lengths easier, faster. He was moaning and grunting Tony’s name. Usually he was never this vocal. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was just because it was Tony.  
Bucky felt it building up slowly. Slowly, slowly, and then all at once when Tony’s other hand reached up and yanked him down for a rough kiss. Rope after rope of thick cum shot over Tony’s hand and stomach, a couple strokes later and Tony was cumming too. He rolled onto the bed next to Tony and pulled him close. There was a mess to clean up on their bodies, and a mess to clean up in their non-friendship. So Bucky did the only reasonable thing he could think of. He closed his eyes and fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Bucky woke up with a throbbing headache. His eyes felt so puffy that he briefly wondered if he even needed them. Maybe he could get Tony to give him some cool robot eyes. Tony. Oh no. He opened his eyes and squinted around, looking for the other man. But he wasn’t there. Bucky didn’t know what to do. He messed up. He messed up bad. What was he thinking? It was a mistake. And now he just had to avoid Tony for the rest of his life. It couldn’t be that hard, right? Tony was clearly already avoiding him. With the two of them working together, hopefully they could pretend nothing ever happened. Bucky figured he’d start now and go sleep the hangover off in his own room. But before he could get up, the bedroom door opened and Tony strolled through holding a tray of food.  
“Good morning, Sunshine.” Tony said walking to Bucky, placing the tray in his lap. “You’re going to eat this, trust me that green sludge of a drink will work miracles for your head right now. Oh and take a shower and head down to the garage and finish up your bike. I have all the parts you wanted. You haven’t been down there in forever, she misses you. And we need to talk.”  
“We need to talk..” He let it trail off almost as if it were a question. The last thing he wanted to do was talk to Tony about what happened. It was hard to pretend it never happened if Tony wanted to yell at him for it.  
“Of course we need to talk. You came into my room all drunk and buff. What was I supposed to do, fight you and that metal arm off?”  
Bucky’s vision blurred for a split second. He never even thought of that. He had just assumed Tony at least enjoyed it because he wasn’t saying no. But he didn’t say yes either did he? All the details of last night just flew out of his head. He was a piece of shit. He took advantage of Tony. Suddenly he wanted to throw up. Guess you cant ever redeem a monster.  
“Woah woah woah!” Tony’s face dropped and he placed his hands on Bucky’s shoulders. “It was a joke. A dumb, stupid joke. I’m really not used to this. And that’s why we need to talk about it. Ok? Last night was totally 100% consensual, believe me. Now drink your sludge and clean up. I’ll see you in the garage before I say something else horrendously uncalled for.”  
With that Tony bolted out the door and left Bucky in a state of shock. Tony had wanted it. Oh thank God. Relief flooded over him. He could sense that Tony was anxious for this conversation, and for the first time he thought that maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as he thought. So, he chugged his glass of green slime, which wasn’t too awful and ate the plate of eggs. With his super soldier healing and whatever Tony put in that drink, his hangover was practically gone already.  
Hoping out of Tony’s bed, he realized he was naked. He was sure he had clothes on when he passed out the night before. And yet, his clothes were in a pile on the floor and the sticky mess on his stomach had been cleaned up. A warm feeling crept through his chest. Tony had taken care of him. It was a sweet sentiment. Or a polite gesture at the very least. He threw on his clothes, which still smelled like that Hell Juice Natasha made him drink. He must’ve spilled it on himself and not realized it. Making his way to his own suite, he ran into Steve, Natasha, and Bruce in the hall.  
“You stink.” Bruce said immediately, wrinkling his nose.  
“That doesn’t surprise me, he wore half the bottle.” Steve said, remembering something Bucky clearly didn’t.  
“Yeah and drank the other half.” Natasha chimed in with a smirk. He could see it in her eyes that she wanted to know exactly what happened, but also had a pretty good idea of what they did last night. Bucky’s cheeks flushed at the thought of Natasha hanging around outside Tony’s room.  
“Half and half, huh?” Bucky nudged Steve’s shoulder. “We all know I wasn’t the only one drinking.”  
“Yeah but you’re the only one who still smells like it. Did you pass out in the hall or something? Don’t you have a shower?” Bucky had never wanted to slap Bruce across the face like he had now. Luckily Natasha was quick on her feet. She threw him a ‘Drop It’ glance.  
“Yeah well I tried, I really did. He just wanted to sleep in the game room last night. Guess we weren’t fun enough for him. But really you need a shower now. Catch up with us after? We’re headed out soon, I’ll text you before we leave.” Natasha was amazing. He knew that she expected a full report as payment for covering for him. And he wanted to make sure he had a full story to tell. So first he would clean up, then he’d see Tony. Hopefully he wouldn’t be a wreak by the time he got to talk to Natasha, because honestly he was a nervous wreak.


	9. Chapter 9

Clean. He was clean. Bucky had never been so clean in his life. And yet he was hesitant to get out of the shower. If he got out, he’d have to get on with the rest of the day, which included seeing Tony. If he stayed here he could pretend everything was fine. But as the minutes ticked on he knew he had to face reality. Sighing, he stepped out of the shower to dry himself off.  
Sometimes it still surprised him to look in the mirror. HYDRA had pumped him full of all the good stuff, and left him more buff than he’d ever imagined he could get. Sure he was never as scrawny as Steve had been, but he never thought of his body as anything special. Now he knew he was a beefcake. Women stared, men too. Surprisingly not too many people got caught up on the metal arm. In fact he was the only one who seemed bothered by it. He hated it with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns. It was a reminder of everything he tried so hard to forget. That he was a monster. That he was a murderer. That he was nothing more than an attack dog, ready to hunt as long as his new owner had the right command words. Sure, everyone was working hard to un-brainwash him, but Bucky couldn’t cling to false hope. He knew the only way to end it was to end everything. Bucky was desperately waiting for the day they sent him back into the field. He’d go out in a blaze of glory. Anything to protect Steve, for good, from himself. Someday, but not today. Today he would die on the inside by listening to Tony yell at him.  
After he got dressed he spent time drying and brushing his hair. Normally he wouldn’t give it this much attention, but he was stalling. The end result was stunning. Natasha would be proud. The little voice in his head said maybe Tony would like it too. Bucky contemplated it for a while before raiding his closet for something better looking. Might as well give Tony a show. He picked out his best clothes he was willing to get dirty, they would be working on his bike after all. He settled on a tight fitting plain gray t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans that hugged his waist and made his ass pop (according to Natasha). Then as a last thought he threw his ponytail into a messy bun, which was also a favorite of Natasha, and headed out to see Tony.  
The whole way to the garage his heart thumped. Surely they would have just one last nice day together fixing his bike before Tony told him to take his bike and leave. Right? Why else would he ask him down here? Maybe if Bucky promised to keep his distance Tony would take it easy on him and not tell anyone else. He didn’t know what to do if everyone turned against him. They wouldn’t let him stay here but they couldn’t let him go either. He was still a hazard.  
After what seemed like forever he got to the garage. Friday must have told Tony that Bucky had arrived because without looking up from the scraps he was fiddling with on the table he said, “I know sometimes I get caught up in my work, but I was beginning to think you weren’t going to show up. What took so long? Avoiding me?” Tony turned around as if to say something, but didn’t. He just stared intently at Bucky.  
“Figured I’d take a shower before I got down here and got even sweatier. I was already turning heads and wrinkling noses.” Bucky told him, trying not to shuffle in place. He was unsure of what to do, where to stand.  
“Getting sweaty…” Tony trailed off before snapping back to reality. “Because we’re working on your bike.”  
He took off in the other direction, dropping the tools in his hands and headed to Bucky’s designated working corner. He followed closely behind the other man. So far so good. Tony hadn’t outright tried to fight him, which was nice. Laid out nice and neat was all the remaining parts for his bike.  
“They’ve been waiting here for a while. You kinda stopped showing up.” Tony told him getting tools out and getting to work, Bucky joined him silently. “If I ordered anything wrong or you need something else let me know, ok?”  
They worked in silence for a long time. After an hour Bucky started to sweat. It was hot in here, so hot. He was really close to Tony and it was making him feel a little flustered. Tony was in a black tank top, showing off his slight muscles. The more he looked, the harder it was to ignore them. A light sheen of sweat covered the mans arms, making his muscles glisten. Bucky had to tear his eyes away. He was done lying to himself, Tony was sexy. He wanted to bend him over a workbench and take him there. Or suck him off right here and right now. The more he thought about it, the more flustered he became, and the hotter he got. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore and just peeled off his shirt before he sweat through it completely. It was a foolish idea wearing something so tight. He should’ve picked something baggier, or at least cooler.  
Tony’s eyes flicked up to his, then roamed over his chest and abs. He felt himself flush and hoped Tony wasn’t getting the wrong idea. He was only trying to cool down, not make a move. It felt like an eternity before Tony finally said something.  
“You know, I forgive you.” Bucky almost dropped the rag in his hand. Oh boy, here it comes. “For my parents.”  
“What…” He didn’t know what to say. This wasn’t what he was expecting at all. This felt like it was going to be a heartfelt conversation, not a stern talking to.  
“Yeah I know, that’s the wrong thing to say. I’m not really good at this.” The other man sighed and rubbed a hand down his face, leaving a little black smudge on his cheek. “What I’m trying to say is I was wrong for blaming you. It wasn’t really you. I know that now. They used you as a weapon. Like the Ten Rings tried doing with me.”  
After a second Bucky remembered what he was talking about. Steve told him the story. Tony was kidnapped by terrorists, forced to build a bomb. But he escaped. Because he was a brilliant man.  
“And who knows,” He continued on. “Maybe a little more torture, a little less Yinsen, maybe I would’ve built the Jericho for them. But I wasn’t alone, you were. I read your file. It took a long time to break you.”  
It was true. He may have lost track of how long it took, but he knew it was a long time. Torture. Solitary confinement. Starvation. Beatings. Electrocution. Other unspeakable things that he didn’t even want to think about. They kept putting him to sleep when he resisted too hard and woke him up at a later date with new ‘trainers’ until he was ready to comply. He never thought about it before, but now he wondered…If he hadn’t been alone, would he have fought longer or caved quicker? There was no use dwelling on it now. He had been all alone, but he was glad. Bucky would never wish what he went through on anyone else.\  
“So I hope you can forgive me, I almost took off your arm in Siberia.” Tony said gesturing at his metal arm. “Is it damaged at all? I didn’t think of it before. But I can fix it for you.”  
“Not from you, no.” Bucky extended his arm to Tony, flexing it. He gave it a sour look. Bucky wished he could have his real arm back. So he could hold Tony in both hands. He wanted to feel every inch of Tony on himself.  
“I know that look. That’s how I looked at this for a while.” Tony said, pointing to the light in his chest. Its not apart of me. It doesn’t belong. But I cant do amazing things with it. All it took was a little bit of renovating. I can take a look at your arm, spruce it up. Give you something new?”  
The gesture was so sweet. It accompanied a hopeful look in Tony’s eyes. Bucky’s heart swelled just a little and he let the words low out before he could stop them. “I’d like that a lot, Doll.”  
His heart dropped. That was something he called Tony in his head. He couldn’t believe he just said it out loud. But Tony just smiled and play punched his arm before standing up.  
“It’s a new century, Old Man. No one says Doll anymore. It’s Babe. Or Dear. Sweetie, Darling, Honey. Stuff like that. Doll is so 1900’s”  
“Darlin’ and Honey were pretty popular in my time too you know. And I’m not old. Technically I’m younger than you.” Bucky grabbed Tony’s outstretched hand and pulled himself up. They were only a few inches apart.  
“No, TECHNICALLY I’m younger than you. You’ve just been stuck in your 30’s for longer, while I moved on. Not that it matters, you cant put an age limit on sexy, and trust me, I’ve still got it, Babe.”  
Maybe Bucky was imagining things but he felt a heat between them. He desperately wanted to pull Tony into a kiss, but before he could the garage door flew open and a young boy came flying through.  
“Mr. Stark! I have something really important-” The boy stopped when he noticed the two men in front of him standing inches apart. They both took a couple steps back, trying to be casual. “Oh sorry. Am I interrupting….something?”


	10. Chapter 10

Bucky briefly wondered if he could roundhouse kick this cock-blocking kid in the face. Probably not, he decided. What a shame. A blush crept across his cheeks. Tony called him Babe. He was shirtless and standing in Tony’s personal space. And they got caught. He was blushing mostly because he was embarrassed. Mostly. A part of him was feeling hot and bothered at the thought of getting caught. Hopefully next time it would be in a much more compromising position by someone other than a kid.  
“Are you interrupting something?” Tony repeated the boys words back at him. “You walk in on two half naked, sweaty men and you assume something’s going on? Good thing you didn’t come in two minutes later. It would’ve tainted your sweet, virgin mind.”  
The boy sputtered and flushed, looking desperate for anything to say before Tony saved him from the embarrassment of answering. “We’re fixing a bike, get your mind out of the gutter. I know Aunt May taught you some manners. Knock next time Peter. Or let Friday know.”  
“I’m so sorry, Mr. Stark.” The kid, Peter, told him. He awkwardly shuffled in place. Bucky wondered who was more uncomfortable right now, him or Peter. Probably Peter. The kid kept talking to Tony about… something. Probably school. To be honest, Bucky wasn’t listening. He was too busy thinking of what Tony said. Did he mean it when he said another few minutes and something sexy would’ve been going on? Or was he just trying to make Peter feel uncomfortable? Tony did have a weird sense of humor like that. Bucky hoped it was the first one. A small voice tore him out of his thoughts.  
“It’s an honor to meet you, Sergeant. Sir. Mr. Barnes?” Peter said, unsure of himself. Bucky’s heart melted just a little. Peter was so small and polite and shy. It reminded him of a very young Steve. “I mean we kind of met before. At the airport. Sorry about webbing your hand up and all that stuff.”  
“Bucky.” He told him, outstretching his hand to shake the younger mans. “Please. Or you’ll make me feel old. You got some pretty good moves. Are you gunna be here for a while? I’d like a rematch.”  
Peter’s eyes lit up. Bucky could almost feel the excitement rolling off him in waves. He reached down and picked up his shirt to put it back on. He thought he saw Tony frown for a split second  
“You are old, Grandpa.” Tony scoffed. “What are you, like a hundred?”  
“One hundred and one. Which is old enough to tell you to respect your elders, son.”  
Peter thought that was hilarious. Tony did not. Bucky just stuck his tongue out at him which made Tony quirk an eyebrow. Just then Natasha sent him a text.  
‘Please tell me you’re ready to spill the beans, Soldier. I’m in my room’  
“Well, children, its been fun. But there’s a red headed Queen requesting my presence.” Bucky told them as he headed out. He heard a cry of protest presumably from Tony as he shut the door behind him.  
Sure they didn’t have the conversation they needed to, but Bucky was feeling unusually good about himself. He just needed a second opinion on this. Hopefully Natasha would listen and then tell him there was something there, that Bucky wasn’t just imagining things. She did know Tony better after all.  
____________________________________________________________  
The door flew open on his first knock. Clearly Natasha had been waiting close by for him. She had changed out of the clothes she had been in earlier, opting for sweats and a tank top instead. Natasha never had to try to look beautiful, she just was. Some might call it a natural beauty, but Bucky knew better. The Red Room had done a number on her. He vaguely remembered the face she had before. Chubby. Plain. Childlike. Every time they sent her in for training, her face looked just a little different. The curve of her nose, the line of her jaw, they even changed the shape of her eyes. Slowly over the years they changed her appearance. Just like they did with all the other girls. They turned them from plain Jane’s into sexy, deadly weapons. And they were taught to use their bodies as weapons.  
“Did you dress up for me?” Natasha asked, looking him up and down. “I wish I’d known, I would’ve put a little effort into my outfit.”  
“Natalia, you would rock a brown paper bag and you know it.” He told her, giving her a peck on the forehead.  
“Of course I know it. It doesn’t hurt to hear it though.”  
He laughed and followed her to the couch. Bruce was there sprawled out in his pajamas. They gave each other a small wave and smile. Natasha nudged his feet over and flopped down next to him. Bucky took the couch opposite. He liked Bruce, really. He just wasn’t sure he wanted to have a heart to heart with him about the urge to plow one of Bruce’s close friends.  
“So tell me what happened last night.” Natasha told him, obviously not worried about Bruce like Bucky was. “I want all the details.”  
“Ему действительно нужно услышать грязные детали?”  
“ Грязные? Ну, теперь я должен услышать.” Bruce smirked at him. Bucky was completely floored. He never knew Bruce spoke Russian. Of course he did, though. Bruce was brilliant.  
“Yes everyone in this room speaks Russian. And a lot of other languages for that matter.” Natasha told him. “And Bruce knows as much about your situation as I do. He asked too many questions earlier. I had to spill the beans. Look on the bright side, who better to analyze Tony’s behavior than his friend, the Doctor?”  
“Not that kind of Doctor.” Bruce reminded her. He said it like this wasn’t the first time he’s had to explain to someone that he wasn’t a psychiatrist.  
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. All those PhD’s and you couldn’t get one for Psychology. Anyways, tell us everything, Bucky.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had the urge to write lately. Comments and Kudos only help. So feel free to leave questions/comments/concerns/love for me to read, I really appreciate it.


	11. Chapter 11

“So you like him.” Bruce said matter-of-factly. “People usually either love Tony or hate him. He’s just got that kind of personality.”  
“I like Tony. That doesn’t mean I want to jump his bones every time I see him.” Natasha replied in between sips of her drink. “Bucky has a whole other problem completely.”  
“Yes, and I need a solution to my problem, ok?” Bucky told them, using air quotes for the word ‘problem’. He was getting more embarrassed by the second.  
“I don’t really think that’s the right word to be using for this. It’s not really a problem. It’s a different world now, Bucky. Two men together isn’t really a problem. Well, not for most people anyways.” Bruce explained. “And besides, I think you’ve got a fairly good shot at this. Before Pepper came along Tony was a playboy. He slept with a lot of women and men. And from what you say, I think Tony is interested.”  
“I totally agree. Tony likes to flirt. Its in his nature. And he likes to sleep with people. But you know I think you should talk to him about all this.”  
Bucky was so relieved. Two of his best friends were ok with this. He couldn’t imagine ever having a conversation like this back before he joined the army. Hopefully Steve would be ok with this. First he’d talk to Tony, then Steve. Because he really, really needed to talk to Tony. Times may have changed but he hadn’t. He was raised to be a gentleman, and he was determined to stay that way. He was interested in Tony, his friends were encouraging it, so he was going to court him. Or at least try. But was it better to talk to Tony first and then ask him out, or just shoot his shot and hope he didn’t get shut down and laughed at?  
“I’m nervous.” Was all he could manage to say.  
“What’s the worst that happens? He tells you he isn’t interested? Just snap his neck.”   
“Tasha, no.” Bruce scolded her, slapping her on the shoulder with a couch pillow. “Just trust your gut. Talk to him, sleep with him, set up a romantic candle-lit dinner, anything. Tony is a lot more flexible with these things than you’d imagine. I’m sure he’d appreciate you making a move first. You said he tried talking to you about it already. I know he’s not good at having a serious conversation with anyone. But he tried, and it counts for something.”  
“Ok. I’ll do it. I don’t know what yet, but I’m going to go and think it over. Thank you guys so much. But if I get embarrassed I’ll hunt you two down.”  
They laughed it off and said their goodbyes. Bucky planted a kiss on Natasha’s head as she wished him good luck. He didn’t know what he did to deserve such good friends. He was also glad that Natasha and Bruce seemed to be working things out again. He would have to ask her about that the next time he got her alone. But he knew she would share when she was ready to.  
Ever since Bruce had returned from his little space adventure he and Natasha had been a little touch and go. She was mad at him for leaving, among other things. (I.e. Brunnhilde) Not that Natasha would ever admit to being jealous. But Thor and Brunnhilde and the rest of the Asgardian’s were being ‘rehomed’ by what was left of underground S.H.E.I.L.D. Agents. There was the question of where they would go, stay on Earth or be sent elsewhere. The planet was overpopulated enough without a couple hundred aliens being added to the mix. So they were in an undisclosed location for the time being. Bucky wasn’t sure what would happen or how long they would be there. Occasionally Thor visited with news. Unfortunately Bucky didn’t care enough to pay too much attention to what he was saying regarding his people. It really wasn’t any of his business. What did catch his attention was the fact that Thor’s brother, Loki, was ‘unofficially’ with him, and that was only because of the pure outrage that rippled through the Avengers. Eventually he would have to ask about Loki. He knew the gist of it, but he was sure there was more to it than what was on the surface.  
Just like there was more to Bucky than what showed. The world saw the Winter Soldier. Those who dug deeper saw Bucky. And he was glad he got that second chance. Especially from Tony. That’s when he decided he wanted to get to know more of Tony’s story. What better way to get to know someone than an awkward first date? An idea started to form in his head.  
“Friday I’m gunna need your help.”  
“At your service, Sergeant.” The Lady in the walls replied. It was time to get his plan in action. Hopefully he’d sweep Tony right off his feet.


	12. Chapter 12

It was surprisingly easy. Friday managed to keep everyone out of the kitchen for the night. She got everyone out for dinner or had them order in, telling them the kitchen was closed for maintenance. Brilliant and a little unsettling, Friday managed to lie her way around any questions the Avengers asked. She also had a care package sent over for Bucky almost immediately. So after he showered and got dressed up in his nicest fancy, yet casual clothes, Bucky got to work.  
First he cleaned everything up. Then he set the mood with a fancy tablecloth and two tall white candles. He set out two wine glasses, then got to cooking. He had to ask Friday before hand what Tony liked to eat. Burgers weren’t fancy enough for what he had in mind and oysters weren’t really his style, so in the end he decided on steak. With seasoned chopped potatoes and bacon wrapped asparagus on the side, Bucky thought it made a fairly good meal. Not super fancy, but he was a half decent cook. Hopefully Tony liked it, because Bucky definitely enjoyed the little bites he was tasting while cooking.  
The plan was simple. All he had to do was get everything ready. Friday had the harder part. Kepping everyone out, which she was doing amazing with already, and getting Tony there. Honestly he wasn’t sure if Tony would show up or not. They discussed it beforehand. Bucky wanted it to be a surprise. Friday just had to talk Tony into (hopefully) showering and getting dressed, and then get him to come down here. If he absolutely wouldn’t comply, then Bucky told her she could tell Tony it was supposed to be a date. He hoped it wouldn’t come to that.  
Bucky put the food on the table and got out a bottle of wine Friday recommended. He doubled and then tripled checked to make sure everything looked perfect before instructing Friday to send Tony on his way. He sat down and waited. In theory Tony’s room was only a couple minutes away from the kitchen, but it felt like an eternity to Bucky. He was so nervous that his hands started to sweat. Just when he thought Tony wasn’t going to show he heard a tiny gasp come from the doorway.  
Tony stood there, mouth slightly parted, staring at him. He wore grey dress pants with a blue button up shirt. Casual, but Bucky thought he looked amazing. For a few seconds they just stared at each other before Tony stared laughing. Bucky felt his heart drop right out of his chest. This wasn’t the reaction he wanted.  
“Friday, you’re absolutely unbelievable!” Tony said, gesturing at the air. “You got my own A.I. to trick me? Absolutely brilliant. Don’t do it again though. Honestly I was ready to disable her. She kept telling me I didn’t have access to why I was getting all dressed up with no where to go. How can I not have access? I made her!”  
Bucky laughed. He figured Tony might get a little ticked off. But he had just assumed Friday would cave in and tell him about tonight. He was glad Tony didn’t disable her. She was amazing. If Friday had a body he would hug her. But the last time they gave one of Tony’s A.I.’s a body, things didn’t turn out so well. So he would just have to find a way to make all this up to a thing with no form. He wondered how he’d do that. But it was a problem for some other time.  
Tony walked to the table and took a look at everything before he sat down. With the lights dimmed and the candles flickering, Tony’s face lit up in a way that made Bucky practically swoon. If he hadn’t spent so much time on dinner Bucky would suggest they skip it and try some other, more fun activities.  
“I’m used to the one doing stuff like this. I can’t believe it’s the other way for a change. Good choice in wine, and this food looks great! You look great. Let me guess, Friday helped you pick out this stuff? I knew it was a good idea to program them to know what I like and don’t like.” Tony was rambling. Bucky could tell he was nervous. So was he. “Wow did you cook all this by yourself? Amazing. I’m a terrible chef. I‘d burn cereal.”  
“Woah slow down.” Bucky said gently. “I have a lot of questions for you, don’t wear yourself out all at once.”  
“Talking never wears me out. I like more physical activities for that. You know, running, jumping jacks, three rounds of sex, Pilates. The fun stuff.” He gave Bucky a wink and a smirk. Bucky wanted nothing more than to take him up on that unsubtle offer. But not now. Right now he was going to be the gentleman he was raised to be.  
“Sorry about the secrecy. I wanted this to be a surprise. And yes I asked Friday for suggestions on food. I’d say she deserves your forgiveness.”  
“This is pretty nice. I guess I could forgive her…Tomorrow. I’m still mad at her tonight. That’s only fair.”  
“Whatever you say, Boss.” Friday chimed into the conversation, making Bucky jump slightly. He forgot they were never really alone. Friday was everywhere. The technology blew his mind the first time he learned about it.  
“Not another peep out of you, Missy. I’m going to enjoy my date in peace.” Tony told her before sipping at his wine. “So you had some questions for me? I think I’ve got a couple for you.”  
They spent the next hour talking. Surprisingly they never had to struggle to make small talk at all. The conversation just flowed from one topic to another. It never got too morbid, they just brushed over things like the Winter Soldier, the cave in Afghanistan, and all the atrocities they’ve committed. Bucky learned all about Tony’s childhood. Tony really had always been a brilliant man, even from a young age. Bucky was completely enthralled. Even after their dinner was gone, the still talked, just enjoying each others company. Eventually they decided to call it a night. Bucky walked Tony to his room.  
“So I had a really great time tonight.” Bucky told the other man. He was having such a great time that he didn’t want the night to be over. “And I hope we can do it again sometime.”  
“Ok but I’m planning next time. I’ll take you out. Show you a good time.”  
“I’m sure you will.” They both laughed. Bucky adored the laugh lines on Tony’s face. “Is it alright if I kiss you?”  
“You’re joking right?” Tony asked amused. Bucky just smiled. “You’re not joking. You’re serious. I forgot you’re old fashioned. Figured after what we did last night you could just kiss me whenever you want. But hey, you’ve got permission now, Kiss away, Babe.”  
Bucky grabbed onto the smaller mans waist. A brief flare of anger shot through him once again with his metal arm. He just wished he could feel Tony with both his hands. But the anger was replaced by a warm tingling through his body. One hand was better than none. He just wanted to feel Tony. His head dipped down and captured Tony’s lips on his own. It started off slow, each man getting used to the others mouth. But pretty soon it started heating up. Tony was the first to break. He pressed his length against Bucky’s leg and let out a sigh. Bucky let it go on for a few more seconds before pulling away.  
“Please tell me you’re coming in my room. We already fooled around. You don’t have to be that old-fashioned.” Tony looked up at him with eyes blown wide.  
“That’s not appropriate for first date behavior.” Bucky told him, giving him one last peck on the lips before stepping back. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”  
“You’re unbelievable. And damn lucky that food was good. Or else I’d be really mad at you for making me deal with this alone.” Tony gestured to the bulge starting in his pants. The thought of Tony touching himself was what Bucky would be touching himself to tonight. It made his cock throb. They said their goodnights and parted ways. Third date. That was long enough for Bucky to wait to still be considered gentlemanly, right? He just needed the next two dates to happen fast, because that seemed like forever to wait before he could have Tony again. It took all he had not to turn around and take Tony up on that offer.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys. This chapter was supposed to come out last night, but about halfway through I realized I couldn't see out of my left eye. Then I tried finishing it today and couldn't focus. Sooooooo here's this, enjoy

“You guys need to slow it down. Or hit me up with some of that good-good you got in your blood.” Sam said in defeat. He had fallen behind quite a few laps ago and was upset he couldn’t catch up. He never could. Sure he was fast compared to most people. But Steve and Bucky weren’t like everyone else.  
“I wouldn’t say it’s in our blood. But I do think it’s all jam packed into these muscles.” Bucky told him, flexing his arm for show. “Trust me, you couldn’t handle it.”  
“Excuse you?” Once glance at Sam’s face and Bucky could practically hear the silent ‘Bitch’ at the end of his sentence.  
“Alright enough.” Steve intervened. “If I have to hear this conversation one more time, I’m not hanging out with you guys anymore.”  
“That’s weak, Stevie.” Bucky said as they all sat down for a water break. “You love when I tell him all the things you cant say to his face.”  
“Bucky!” Bucky dodged away from the hand that swung at his shoulder and laughed. He had to admit, after all this time, Sam was alright. He didn’t get on Bucky’s nerves nearly as much as he had before. Occasionally he was even funny. So as long as Steve liked Sam, Bucky wouldn’t be a complete ass towards him. He still liked to have fun though. And teasing Sam was great. Some good old frenemy bonding.  
Bucky had been in an amazing mood since his date the other night. He had a great time with Tony and he was looking forward to their date tonight. Tony wouldn’t tell him where they were going or what they were doing. It was a little frustrating, but Bucky loved a good surprise. Friday was even going to pick out an outfit to wear, since Tony wouldn’t even tell him how to dress. At least Tony was considerate enough not to let him over/under dress.  
They hadn’t been alone together since their first date. Mostly because Bucky had been avoiding Tony. So, Tony did the next best thing, and kept sending Bucky lewd texts. Bucky could feel himself slowly starting to cave. He firmly felt that waiting was the respectable thing to do. It was just so hard when Tony was practically throwing himself at Bucky. He wanted to show Tony that he was more than some meaningless hookup. So every suggestive text was answered with feigned ignorance. It was easy to deflect Tony’s advances over a phone. Bucky just wasn’t sure if he could do it in person.  
“Bucky are you listening to me or are you just going to keep staring at your phone?” Steve asked a little louder, trying to hook Bucky into the conversation.  
“Just reading something from Tony. He wants to finish up my bike soon.” It was true that Tony wanted to finish something. It just wasn’t the bike.  
“You know I’m glad you two have been spending time together. He wasn’t doing good for a while after Pepper. It’s good for him to have friends that can help him through this.” Steve said it so sincerely that Bucky wanted to tell him the truth. He hated lying to his friend. But he justified it as withholding the truth. A truth that could jeopardize their friendship. He knew he would have to tell him eventually. Just not until he was ready.  
“Yeah well I’m just glad he isn’t trying to kill me anymore.” Bucky attempted to deflect the conversation away from the time he and Tony were spending together.  
“Wish he still was.” Sam mumbled, which immediately started an argument between him and Bucky. It only ended with the threat of Steve knocking their two heads together. The rest of the morning was spent doing ‘training maneuvers’, which mainly consisted of Sam and Bucky trying to outdo each other.  
After that Bucky cleaned up and tried finding ways to kill time until it was time to meet Tony. He grabbed a book, read the same page ten times, and put it down again. Next he scrolled through Netflix for twenty minutes trying to find something to watch. But no matter what put on, he couldn’t concentrate. Finally he threw on a documentary and half listened, half daydreamed about Tony.  
After what felt like an eternity, Bucky decided to get ready. He was a little puzzled to see the clothes laid out on his bed weren’t a suit. They weren’t fancy at all. He was also a little puzzled as to how Friday managed to get the clothes out of the closet and onto the bed. Maybe one of Tony’s robots? Occasionally Bucky saw them roaming the hallways, cleaning, fixing things.  
Bucky slipped into the Black v-neck t-shirt and skinny jeans. Black on black was definitely a good look on him, he made a note to wear it more often. He put his hair up in a bun, because Tony seemed to like it like that. As a last touch he sprayed a little cologne on himself. Hopefully Tony liked the smell of it. Bucky sure did. As he slipped out the door, he couldn’t help but smile to himself. Tonight was going to be fun, he was sure of it.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, i had to force a chapter out. Im sorry, lovelies. If yall think its trash, just let me know. But if you like it, please kudos comment and favorite it. It motivates my lazy self to write more. Thanks again

“Tony I honestly wasn’t expecting this.” Bucky told Tony as they pulled into a parking lot.   
“I know but it’s great isn’t it? I’m full of surprises.” Tony said, practically bouncing. Bucky had rarely seen the other man so excited. He couldn’t help but admire how beautiful Tony looked right now.  
“The last time I went bowling, I was a teenager. This is just…wow. I never would’ve even thought of coming here.”  
They walked inside and it was empty. There was an employee behind the front desk, and Bucky could see a few people through the kitchen windows. But there wasn’t any other people bowling. Sure it was a Tuesday night, but there must’ve been some people who come here on weekdays? He briefly wondered if Tony bought the place out for the night. Deciding that was most likely the case, Bucky couldn’t help but feel pleased. It was a nice gesture. Bucky wasn’t sure how comfortable he was with publicly being out on a date with another man. He knew they were sure to draw a lot of attention. If people weren’t staring at his metal arm, they would definitely be ogling Tony. The man was like a magnet. Anywhere he went, people went insane. They asked for pictures, autographs, hugs. Everyone loved Iron man. And Iron Man loved the attention. But Bucky didn’t. So he was really glad no one else was there.  
After they got their bowling shoes from the overly peppy worker, Tony led the way to the lane in the middle. A man came over to take their order. Bucky figured that wasn’t usually how it worked here. But with them being the only two customers, he was sure the man had nothing better to do than come to them. Tony ordered two large pizzas and some beers. Bucky laughed to himself. Such a plain date. With plain food. He loved it. Just spending time with Tony was good enough for him, no matter where they were.  
“Alright. Prepare to lose, Barnes.” Tony grinned, picking up a pink ball. Bucky just snorted in reply. He was going to kick Tony’s ass, he was sure of it. Which is why he was ecstatic when Tony only got a five on his first turn. Only a five? Bucky could beat that. How hard could it be?  
As it turned out, they were both terrible at bowling. Not a single strike happened between the two of them. And the longer the night went on, the worst they got. Every time Tony lost a game he would pout until Bucky gave him a peck on the cheek and promised to let him win the next round. Every time Bucky lost, Tony would do a victory dance. Which mainly consisted of him shaking his ass around in Bucky’s general direction. And Bucky loved it. He got a kiss or a little dance, so he won either way.  
“You know it amazes me you all haven’t eaten me out of house and home yet. Between You, Steve, Natasha, and Peter when he visits, I’m lucky there’s ever any food in the house.  
“I cant help it.” Bucky told him through a mouthful of his sixth slice of pizza. “Do you know how fast my metabolism is? I have to feed the hunger.”  
“Yeah you super soldiers sure do eat enough to feed a whole army.” Tony said, sipping out of his glass of beer.  
“You wont like me when I’m hungry.” For some reason that made Tony laugh really hard. “It’s not my fault you barley eat at all.”  
“I’m not dead and I’m not boney. So I eat enough. I just don’t have a hollow leg like you all do to store food in.”  
“Leg? I’d say its more of an arm.” Bucky flexed his metal fingers at Tony.  
“Hilarious. Speaking of which, I think I finally found a solution to your arm problem. It’s only a prototype, I’ve got a few more kinks to work out, but I figured I’d let you know. But that’s more of a work thing and less of a date thing so we can talk about it later.”  
Bucky was amazed at the speed in which Tony worked. It hadn’t been long at all since he mentioned his dislike of his Hydra-made arm to Tony, and yet the other man was already working on fixing it. Maybe it was something he had been working on for a while before. But Bucky appreciated it none-the-less. He hated his metal arm, so Tony was trying to replace it with something that would make him happy.  
Eventually they decided to head home. They had spent the last hour taking a ‘break’ from bowling, deciding to talk and drink instead. Tony handed Bucky the keys, asking him to drive. Tony said he didn’t drive drunk anymore. There was a story there, but he wouldn’t pry. He would hear it whenever Tony was ready to tell him. The drive back seemed shorter than the drive there, but maybe that was because he knew he would have to say goodbye soon.  
Just like before, Bucky walked Tony to his door. And just like before, Tony tried to get Bucky to come inside his room. It started with a slow kiss. A proper goodnight kiss. But Bucky let his hands drift down to Tony’s hips, and the other man let out a moan. And suddenly Bucky couldn’t help it, he shoved Tony against the wall and kissed him harder, hoping to hear that soft, sweet moan again. It was hypnotic. Tony licked Bucky’s lower lip gently, and Bucky let him in. As his cock began to grow, he felt a tingle as he felt Tony’s brush against his.  
Bucky couldn’t help but grind up against Tony. Just the thought of Tony pinned between him and the wall was driving him crazy. He needed more. His hands slipped under Tony’s shirt, reveling in the moan in caused. Bucky nibbled and sucked on the other mans plump lower lip. Just as Tony trailed his hands down to unbutton Bucky’s pants, he heard a noise from the other end of the hall. Bucky pulled away from Tony only to see a very angry looking Steve standing there.


	15. Chapter 15

Time seemed to stand still. Bucky stood there, frozen, pressed up against Tony. He desperately tried to think of something to say. Not once in all the years they’ve known each other had Steve ever looked at him with such raw emotion in his eyes. It was anger and something else Bucky couldn’t quite place. It made him feel sick to his stomach.  
It was like all three of them were waiting for the other to say something first. Bucky tried but his throat seemed drier than the Sahara Desert all of a sudden. As he pulled away from Tony, Steve threw them one last disgusted look before he turned around and headed back down the hall. Heart sinking in his chest, he could feel hot tears prickling in his eyes. He tried hiding it the best he could, not really wanting Tony to see him cry. He was already embarrassed enough. Should he go after Steve and try to explain? Or was it better to let Steve have time to cool off and then talk to him about it? The latter option meant Steve would only have more time to dwell on being angry, so Bucky decided he needed to bite the bullet and go find him now.  
“Tony, I…” Bucky tried speaking, but nothing would come out. What was he even supposed to say?  
“Looks like someone’s still stuck in the forties.” Tony said, rubbing a hand down his face. Whether the blush on his cheeks was out of embarrassment of being caught, or still from the rush of their make-out session, Bucky wasn’t sure. “He’s your friend. Just go talk to him. I’m sure you can work things out.”  
“Yeah.” Even though Bucky agreed, he wasn’t really sure. He had really hoped Steve wouldn’t react so extremely.  
“Go find him. Good luck.” Tony gave him one last soft kiss. “And if things go bad, you can sleep in my room, ok? I mean it. Just sleep. I can be good at this whole comforting thing. Promise.”  
That made Bucky’s heart ache just a little less. He probably could use some comfort cuddles after this. It may be bad now, but it could get a lot worse in a few minutes. Bracing himself, he headed in the direction of Steve’s room.  
Standing outside Steve’s door, Bucky just tried to prepare himself for anything horrible he could think of Steve saying to him. Slurs. Insults. Disappointment. Maybe Steve would stop talking to him all together like they weren’t friends. Like they weren’t family. Slowly he reached out and knocked on the door. An eternity ticked by before the door swung open. Steve stood there with the same expression on his face that he had when he caught Bucky with Tony.  
“Can I come in?” Bucky’s voice was just barley a whisper. “I can explain.”  
Steve looked at him for a second before stepping aside to let him enter. Now that he was inside, he felt a little trapped. But this was Steve. And his Steve would never hurt him. No matter what, he kept telling himself. They just stood in the living room, Steve glaring at Bucky, arms crossed, Bucky staring at the floor, unable to make eye contact.  
“I know you don’t get it. We were raised a whole different way. But things are different now. It’s not a big deal for two guys to be together. And its not just guys I like. Its girls too. But with Tony, it’s just something else. He makes me feel happier than I’ve been in such a long time. You may not think it’s right, but I like him, I really do. And I wanted to tell you sooner, I was just afraid. Afraid you’d be mad. Afraid you’d hate me. Afraid to lose you. I’ve already lost so much. I cant lose you too. Please. You cant make me pick between the two of you. I need you, Stevie.”  
Hot tears streamed down his face. Here he was, begging for Steve to forgive him, crying like a child. Bucky couldn’t help it. He had never felt so raw and vulnerable before. Baring his soul, all Bucky could do was hope that Steve could accept it all. Strong arms wrapped around Bucky’s body, pulling him into a hug. He let out a sob as he burried his face down onto Steve’s shoulder. Whatever he was expecting, it hadn’t been this. Steve rubbed Bucky’s back until he settled down. Then he sat them down onto the couch and stared at Bucky for a while, with moist eyes also.  
“Buck. There’s nothing you could do that would make me hate you. I don’t ever want you to think you’re going to lose me. And I’m not going to make you choose between me or Tony. I don’t care that you’re gay. Or half gay?” Steve’s nose wrinkled in confusion before continuing. “I’m mad that you didn’t tell me. We’re family, Bucky. You can tell me anything. I mean it. I’m mad that you clearly are really smitten with someone and you didn’t tell me.”  
Bucky was shocked. Warmth spread through his chest so fast that it prickled a few more tears out of his eyes. Steve didn’t hate him. He felt so relieved.  
“And I’m mad that it’s Tony.” Steve said, a little quieter this time. That confused Bucky. He wasn’t sure why Tony was a problem. He and Steve were friends, after all. “I know that nothing I say is going to change your mind, and I don’t want to. If he makes you happy, then I’ll be happy with that. I just think you should be careful. Tony is… Well he’s Tony. Just don’t let him break your heart, ok?”  
“Oh come on, Stevie. He breaks my heart, I break his skull.” Bucky laughed, drying at his eyes. “If you don’t do it for me of course.”  
“Absolutely right, I’ll break him for you.” Steve sighed. “I want you to know that I wasn’t just mad at you. I was mad at Tony, too. Two of my best friends are a thing, and neither of them can tell me? That hurts you know.”  
Oh. He never thought about it like that. He was so busy worrying about Steve being mad about Bucky being with a man that he never stopped to think that it would hurt his feelings. But of course it did. His friends were happy, and they couldn’t even share it with him. Again, Bucky felt embarrassed.  
“I’m going to have to have a firm conversation with Tony too. Wouldn’t want him to feel left out. But from now on I want to know everything. So you might as well start from the beginning.” Leaning back, Steve settled in to the couch like he was expecting Bucky to read him a whole novel. Now that he could openly talk to his friend about this stuff, Bucky felt a weight being lifted off his shoulders.  
“Alright. So, the first time he snuck into my room,” Bucky started the story, wording it that way specifically in order to make Steve look shocked and embarrassed. Steve had always been a borderline prude. Bucky was going to enjoy making this story as scandalous as he accurately could, just to watch Steve squirm. What else were friends for?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, give me love and I'll give you chapters. let me know if there's anything you guys want me to work into the story.


	16. Chapter 16

“Tony, you said we would just sleep.” Bucky said, awaking to the engineer peppering little kisses across his chest.  
“Yeah we slept.” Tony said, flicking a tongue over Bucky’s nipple. “And now we’re up.”  
Last night after his talk with Steve, he came to Tony’s room. True to his word, Tony didn’t try anything. He just scooted over and let Bucky slide into bed. Tony held him and pet his hair until he fell asleep. But Tony was always one to find a loophole. They did sleep, but Tony never said anything about the morning.  
Bucky kept his eyes closed, hoping to trick the other man into thinking he had gone back to sleep. But his heavy breathing and rising cock gave him away. Tony trailed kisses just above the waistband of his boxers, making Bucky twitch.  
“I thought I said I wanted to wait.” Bucky’s hand twisted into the sheets. It was a weak attempt at holding himself back. He desperately wanted to grip Tony’s hair and shove his pretty mouth down on his cock.  
“Yeah yeah you want to wait to have sex. But this isn’t sex.” Tony looked up at him with big brown devilish eyes and nuzzled his cheek on Bucky’s throbbing length, making him moan. “Just a little fooling around, that’s all.”  
“It’s not proper.” Bucky told him, desperately wondering why he was trying to fight this. It felt so good. There was a thousand dirty things he wanted to do to Tony right now.  
“Proper?” The other man laughed and sat up, almost making Bucky whimper at the sudden lack of touching. “I’m not some blushing virgin that you’re going to soil. That ship sailed a long time ago. Come on, we’re both adults that want this, not two teenagers on their very first date.”  
For a second Bucky just stared up at the man sitting above him. Then in one fluid motion he pushed himself up with one hand, smashing their lips together, letting the other hand run through Tony’s hair, gently tugging at it. Their kisses became rough, as if they couldn’t get enough of each other. Or at least Bucky felt that way. He needed Tony like he needed air. He trailed kisses down Tony’s neck, nipping at it, loving the soft gasps he was causing.  
Tony climbed into Bucky’s lap, straddling him. Slowly they started grinding together. Bucky’s hands slid down to cup Tony’s ass. He grabbed and squeezed, enjoying the soft flesh in his hands. Well, hand. They rutted their hardened lengths together fast and hard. He had been waiting a long time to be with Tony again, he wasn’t sure how long he could last. There would always be other times when they could take it slow, be a little more sensual. The room filled with soft gasps and grunts and sooner then he’d like, it was over for him first, then Tony soon after.  
For a while they just sat together, Tony in Bucky’s lap, foreheads pressed together. It was calming, serene. He wished they could stay like that forever. However he knew they had to get up. He had plans to meet Natasha. And God help him if he was late. Natasha wasn’t the type of lady you kept waiting.  
“Doll, I gotta go.” Bucky said, placing a kiss to Tony’s forehead.  
“No, no. Stay.” Tony pouted. It was a beautiful look on him. “That was embarrassingly quick. Give me a minute, we’ll try again.”  
“Believe me, I’d love to. But if I don’t meet Natasha soon, she’s going to come find me and drag me away. Whether I’m naked and having my way with you or not.”  
“You know I’m conflicted with that statement. Having your way with me, that’s sexy. Natasha barging in to stop it, not so sexy. I have the feeling she wouldn’t be that willing to join.”  
“Don’t be nasty. That’s my little girl.” Bucky said, playfully pushing Tony off his lap and pinning him to the mattress.  
“So protective. I like it.” Tony smirked up at him. “I know there’s more to you two than you let on. You ever going to tell me?”  
“Eventually.” Tony noticed the shift in his voice, his body language, and thankfully dropped it. They said goodbye and planned to meet up later, to hang out. Bucky went to get ready for Natasha, but he couldn’t help but think about Tony’s question.  
No one knew the whole story. Some people knew bits and pieces. Mainly Steve, and Bucky assumed Natasha had told Bruce some things too. He just didn’t know how much she told him. But eventually Bucky would tell Tony. If they were going to be together, then Bucky couldn’t hide his past from him. No matter how dark it was. He wasn’t proud of the things he had done. Tony had finally forgiven him for killing his parents. Would he still want to be with a man who had tortured children?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, Kiddies. I think i know the ending to my story. It's still chapters away, so dont worry. But now that i know how it ends, I'll definitely make it to the finish line. That just means that i wont drop this fic and never finish it. So stick with this and you're in for one hell of a ride.


	17. Chapter 17

“No.” Bucky said at the piece of clothing Natasha held in front of him. She had dragged them to a mall not far from home. As long as he kept his arm covered, no one even seemed to notice who they were. Sure, she was an Avenger. But Steve and Tony were the recognizable ones. Natasha was and always will be a spy. She was an expert on not being recognized.  
However right now, Bucky was sure they were turning at least a few heads. And not in a good way. They were smack dab in the middle of a lingerie store, while Natasha loudly asked which one he wanted to wear. He was sure he’d die of embarrassment. Bucky knew she was mostly joking, she did love to embarrass him. But she was also trying to introduce him into a world of kink. Maybe some day, but not now. He didn’t even know if that’s something Tony would be interested in. Bucky in lingerie. In time he would bring it up. But for now he didn’t want to do anything weird to scare Tony off.  
“But it would bring out your eyes!” Natasha pouted and hung it back up, searching for another one.  
“I’m sure it would. I trust your judgment. But for now we’re here getting you something to wear, not me.” Bucky reminded her.  
“Yeah yeah. I already know what I’m getting. I had it picked out pretty much as soon as we walked through the door.”  
“So we’ve been in here for a half an hour for what? To embarrass me? Nice try but it didn’t work.” Bucky lied.  
“Just trying to spice up your sex life. Can’t hate a girl fro trying.”  
She went to grab the piece she had her eye on. It wasn’t much. And by that he meant there wasn’t much to look at. It would barley cover anything she had to show off. No doubt she would look beyond sexy. He knew it would shock Bruce, and that thought made him laugh.  
After that they just wandered the mall, occasionally stopping in a store here and there. Natasha stopped in to buy some baby clothes, which probably would’ve given Bucky a heart attack if he hadn’t known better. She explained that it was Clint’s wife who had a baby. A little boy, much to Natasha’s initial dismay. Now she couldn’t get enough of him. Sometimes she disappeared for a day or two, not even confiding in Bucky where she was. Now he figured she had been visiting Clint and his bouncing bundle of joy. Smart, not letting Bucky know where he kept his family. He was still a loaded weapon, waiting for certain words to pull the trigger. No doubt Clint could handle his own against Bucky. But a baby couldn’t. It was a shame really. Bucky loved babies.  
Fortunately for him, HYDRA never put him through the same mutilation they did to Natasha. The idea to sterilize her was to make sure nothing would ever weaken her, like a child. Love is weakness. However they didn’t believe the same for their men. A boy was trained alongside Natasha and the other girls. As far as Bucky knew, they never snipped his bits either. It’s like they wanted to breed their strongest soldiers, without the hassle of having to birth and raise them. Hopefully Bucky didn’t have any kids floating around from his missing years as the Winter Soldier. It was scary to think of how much he couldn’t remember from that time.  
“Earth to James.” Natasha’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. He could see concern in her eyes.  
“That’s Sergeant to you.” He told her. She hardly ever called him James.  
“Wanna tell me what the hell just happened? You were staring at the ground for like five minutes. It’s like I was talking to a wall.”  
“Oh. I was just thinking” Bucky didn’t realize he spaced out. Occasionally it happened when he was thinking of his past. She understood immediately, and thankfully didn’t pry. They just sat in comfortable silence at the food court for a while before they decided to go home. Bucky could use a little quality time with Tony to lighten his mood.


	18. Chapter 18

He stood in the doorway to Tony’s lab for a while, just watching. The man was working on something, Bucky wasn’t sure what. He saw metal and recognized some tools. But Tony’s skills were light-years beyond his own and sometimes the project needed to be almost complete for Bucky to see what it actually was. The things that Tony could do with his mind blew Bucky away. The engineer was so peaceful when he worked that Bucky couldn’t help but just stand and watch. It was practically the only time Tony was ever quiet. Even if his music wasn’t. Tony had a habit of blasting music as loud as he possibly could while he worked. It wasn’t really Bucky’s taste, but he would never complain.  
After about an hour Tony stopped and looked up, searching for the next piece of the puzzle or perhaps even a tool, but his eyes landed on Bucky leaning against the doorframe instead. It was amusing to see Tony nearly jump out of his skin to say the least. He could rarely ever sneak up on Natasha, but loved doing it to anyone and everyone else.  
“What the hell!” Tony said, slamming the pieces in his hands down on the table in front of him. “I’m going to put a bell on you if you do that again.”  
“I was trained to move with bells.” Bucky told him. It wasn’t his favorite lesson, but sometimes he was grateful for it.  
“Of course you were.” Tony looked concerned with that information. Bucky had become so desensitized to the things HYDRA did to him that sometimes he forgot other people still got upset about it. “How long were you standing there anyways?”  
“About an hour.”  
“Excuse me? You’ve been watching me for a whole hour? Just standing there. Doing nothing. That’s weird. How did you even do that?”  
“I’ve got practice. And I wasn’t doing nothing. I was swooning over you.” Bucky did have practice. A lot of it. He could stay awake for days at a time, not moving. Just waiting with his sniper riffle. He’d done it on many occasions. Regular snipers could stay awake for seventy-two hours. The longest Bucky had ever had to wait behind the scope was five days. It was no trouble for him, though he wasn’t sure how long he could go without sleep without losing touch with reality. The Winter Soldier never really ‘slept’ anyhow. Missions never allowed more than catnaps, and being in Cryo wasn’t really sleep so much as it was just… nothingness. But he wasn’t about to tell Tony that. Not yet. So he would just deflect the conversation and there was no better way to do that than with flattery.  
“Flattery will get you no where.” Tony stopped and then smiled. “Actually it will get you everywhere. Butter me up, Babe, and you can have anything.”  
“Butter? I’m more of a whip cream kinda guy.” Bucky gave him a wink as he said it. Within seconds Tony was in front of him, pulling him into a heated kiss. With one hand he brushed a spot clear on the work bench, with the other hand he effortlessly wrapped an arm around Tony’s waist and lifted him up, placing him on the table.  
“Fuck. That’s hot.” Tony wrapped his legs around Bucky’s waist. He was amazed at how perfectly their bodies fit together. Everything about Tony just felt right. The hand brushing up against his dick as it unzipped his pants felt especially right. Tony stroked him slowly. Too slow. Bucky just wanted to pump into his hand as fast as he could. Instead he pulled out of Tony’s grasp and smirked at the grunt of disapproval he heard.  
Slowly he unzipped Tony’s jeans, pulling them down to his ankles. Kneeling down, Bucky just smiled up at the man above him. He kissed a trail from Tony’s knee right up to his hip, slowly. If Tony was going to tease Bucky, then it was only fair to return the favor. Nipping and sucking bruises into the soft flesh of Tony’s hips, he enjoyed all the gasps and moans they caused.  
“Bucky.” Tony hissed his name, sending shivers down his spine. “Help me out a little, Bud.”  
In one swift motion, Bucky swallowed up Tony’s throbbing cock, letting it slip down into his throat until his nose pressed into Tony’s pubes. Hands gripped through his hair, holding him in place. Sure, Bucky could let Tony be in control, but where was the fun in that? Slowly he bobbed his head up and down, sucking his cheeks in, making a vacuum tight seal. Swirling his tongue around the tip, fondling Tony’s balls, he tried every trick he knew to get Tony to beg. He would bring him to the edge and stop, over and over. Bucky’s own cock dribbled and strained against his underwear. He loved to watch Tony squirm. Finally he took himself in his hand and began to stroke hard and fast. By now Tony had his hands firmly tangled in Bucky’s hair, moaning unabashedly, cheeks flushed red. Bucky let out a moan. Whether it was the vibration or the noise itself that pushed Tony to the edge, he didn’t know. But the feeling of hot liquid spurting down his throat sent Bucky rushing towards his own orgasm right after. Thick ropes of cum shot across his knuckles onto the floor.  
A mess he didn’t feel like cleaning up right now. He nuzzled his face into Tony’s thigh, enjoying the closeness. For a few minutes they just sat like that. Bucky hadn’t even realized that Tony was petting his hair until it stopped. He realized he’d almost fallen asleep.  
“Wow. That was amazing.” Was the first coherent sentence Tony managed to say. “10/10, would do again. No change that. You deserve a better score.”  
“You want to give me a higher score than a perfect score? That’s not how it works, Tony.” Bucky laughed at him. He wondered how he would outdo himself. He didn’t know yet, but he was determined to try. Tony deserved it.  
“Then I’ll make a new scoring system. Your blowjob is the highest ranking score possible.”  
“We’ll see.”  
“Honey, that’s the kind of energy I want out of you all the time. No more of this ‘third date’ crap. Didn’t really follow through with that anyways.”  
“Don’t make me change my mind.” Bucky enjoyed the way Tony pouted at that. But it did make him drop it. He yawned, stretched, and stood up, planting a kiss on Tony‘s perfectly plump lips. “Come on, lets go to bed.”  
“Sure. As soon as I can feel my legs again. This table isn’t exactly comfy.” Tony slid off the work bench, pulling up his pants. He went to lean on Bucky for support, who in turn dodged his hand, letting Tony almost fall. Bucky swooped in and grabbed him, picking him up bridal style. “No. Put me down. It was sexy when you threw me on a table, but this is just embarrassing.”  
“I didn’t throw you anywhere. I gently placed you down, Doll. And I’m carrying you because I’m tired. I need a bed now, and you’re coming with. You look exhausted. .”  
“Fine. But I object completely to being manhandled like this.” Tony tried his hardest to look annoyed, but Bucky could see the amusement in his eyes. “Let’s go, Prince Charming. This Beauty needs his sleep.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy

“Ready to Comply.” The words slipped out easily, like he’d done this before. A voice in the back of his head told him that he had. Just as quick as the voice came, he snuffed it out. He knew he wasn’t allowed to think thoughts like that. He wasn’t allowed to think at all. The soldier just stood motionless, waiting for orders. A faceless man appeared from the shadows to explain his mission to him in detail. Simple. Track and kill. Nothing he hadn’t done before, nothing he wouldn’t do again.  
He ran the car off the road easily enough, watching it smash into the tree. Unfortunately its occupants hadn’t died on impact. A man dragged himself out of the car, begging for help for his wife. It was pathetic.  
“Sergeant Barnes?” The old man asked. The soldier felt a familiar sensation ripple through his body. He pushed it down, ignoring it. Sergeant was a respected title, he knew that much. Clearly the man was confused. He was a Soldier. A weapon. Nothing more. In a flash of rage he beat the mans face in, dragging him back into the car.  
Walking to the other side, he went to finish the job. The mans wife sat there, bloodied and scared. His hand wrapped around her neck, squeezing the life out of her. When she stopped fighting back, he went to get what he really came for out of the trunk. Hearing a soft noise made him freeze in place, he turned to see a small boy sitting in the back seat. Tears mixed in with the blood that dripped down his face.  
“You killed my Mommy” The boy said, sliding across the seat to the other side of the car, trying to get as far away as possible. Kill a man and a woman, retrieve the sample. That was the mission. Unfortunately sometimes other casualties were necessary. The soldier reached in, snatching the boy by the collar of his shirt and dragged him out. The boy screamed, desperately kicking and punching, trying to get out of the mans grasp. He reared back his metal arm to land a deadly blow to the boys face when he heard a familiar voice, a familiar command.  
“Stand down, Soldier!”  
Slowly the boy in his grasp faded away. He blinked. Once, twice. Opening his eyes he looked down to see Tony. Bucky’s hand was tangled into the collar of his shirt. Tony’s eye was starting to swell, the cheekbone underneath split open and bleeding. An Iron Man suit stood behind Tony in Sentry Mode, hand out, repulsor glowing. Bucky looked to his left and saw his metal fist in the air, ready to strike.  
Immediately he let go of Tony, letting the other man stumble back almost falling into bed. Crumbling to the ground Bucky felt tears prickle his eyes. He felt so nauseous that he almost threw up then and there. Bucky wanted to die. He hurt Tony, and he didn’t even know he was doing it. He had been so deep in a memory that he was lucky he’d been pulled out at all. Nothing like it had ever happened before. How was he supposed to live with himself if he had actually succeeded in his ‘mission’?  
“Hey” Tony said, squatting down. Bucky flinched away hard. He couldn’t touch Tony. He’d only hurt him again. “Woah take it easy. It’s just me.”  
“Yeah it’s you.” Bucky told him, unable to stop the tears flowing freely down his face. Realizing the little boy from the dream had been a very young Tony. It knocked the air right from his lungs. “It was you. In the car. Oh god Tony I’m so sorry. I hurt you bad.”  
“What this?” Tony gestured to his now swollen shut eye and shrugged it off. “Trust me, I’ve been in worse shape. Even before I became Iron Man. You’re not even the first one that’s tried throwing punches at me in bed!”  
Tony tried joking around, but Bucky could laugh along side him. How could he have done this? He was a monster and he always would be. HYDRA would never be gone. It was still in his head and it always would be. The Iron Man suit put it’s hand sown and walked away to presumably wherever it had come from. Bucky wished it would come back and shoot him. It was for the best.  
“Wanna tell me about what happened? I’ll assume it was a dream and not just you getting tired of my snoring.” Tony was trying to lighten the mood, but it just crushed Bucky. He would never hurt Tony on purpose. And yet it happened. If he had been sleeping with a knife or a gun under the pillow like he did sometimes, Tony could’ve been dead before Friday even sent for a suit to protect him. “Ok bad joke. Just please tell me what happened.”  
Bucky explained every detail. It wasn’t hard to forget anything, it was seared into his mind. Tony looked unfazed at the whole thing. When he was finally done, Tony just shook his head.  
“Ridiculous. I wasn’t even that little when it happened.”  
“Tony that’s not what you should be focusing on.” Bucky said incredulously. How was Tony acting fine with what had happened?  
“Right. You tried to kill me in your dream. So What? I’m sure a lot of people have dreams about squishing me like a bug. Little do they know I’m a cockroach. Impossible to kill.”  
“Tony.” Bucky was trying to get it through Tony’s thick skull that he was a threat. He always had been and he always would be. “I hurt you. And I couldn’t stop. Didn’t even know I was doing it.”  
“I thought I said I was fine.”  
“Stop!” Bucky snapped. He’d never acted that was to Tony before. He had always been patient, kind, polite. But right now he was on the verge of a meltdown. “It’s in my head. They’re in my head. I’m not safe to be around. I need to go.”  
“Go? Go where? You’re fine here. I’ll fix it. I’ll call in ever favor I have. Give me a few days.” Tony looked distressed now, like he hadn’t understood the severity of everything before. So Bucky wasn’t about to tell him by ‘Go’ he meant ‘go take a dirt nap’. “I can fix this, I promise.”  
Tony looked so hopeful. So sure of himself. Bucky couldn’t help but agree. On one condition. Bucky wasn’t going near anyone until Tony had a solution. Bucky knew Tony couldn’t find one, but he also knew he couldn’t put everyone at risk. Tony pouted and argued, but finally relented when Bucky firmly held his ground. He would just barricade himself in his room, away from everyone, especially Tony, until…Well, until Tony came to tell him the bad news. He wondered how long he had left.


	20. Chapter 20

At first, Bucky didn’t sleep. He wouldn’t let himself. He just laid in his bed replaying the dream in his head over and over. After a while his phone started to buzz. Text after text came through. Bucky didn’t look at a single one of them. It was people checking in on him. People who cared about him. People he would lose. But as long as he was gone, he couldn’t hurt anyone again.  
Eventually he shut off the phone, not waiting for it to die on its own. It was a starkphone, it’s battery life was ridiculously long. He couldn’t bring himself to read any of the messages before the screen went back. However, he caught a few names, and most of them were from Natasha. Hopefully Tony had Bucky’s room placed on lockdown like he requested. That was probably the only way to keep Natasha out. And even then, Bucky wasn’t completely sure she couldn’t find a way around that.   
“Mr. Barnes, the Boss has been asking about you.” Friday’s voice came without warning. While it startled him, he didn’t react at all. He just wished Tony would give up on trying to find a way to fix the unfixable.  
“I’m fine.” Bucky told her. It was a lie. He was the opposite of fine. But they didn’t need to know that.  
Eventually Bucky started to sleep again. Everytime he closed his eyes, images flashed through his head. All the people he had killed, flashing in his mind one after the other. He cried. When the tears wouldn’t come anymore, Bucky reverted to anger. One by one, he broke everything in his room. The dresser ended up tipped on its side, clothes sprawled everywhere. The remote had gone straight through the tv. There was several fist sized holes in the wall. The coffee table was snapped in two. Anything Bucky could get his hands on was destroyed.  
It wasn’t fair. Growing up, life hadn’t been great, but he made the best out of it. Then he ‘died’ to give birth to the Winter Soldier, leaving behind everyone in his life. HYDRA tried ripping out everything that made him Bucky Barnes and replacing it with a monster. Years of torture, and they succeeded. And when he finally could see the light at the end of the tunnel, in the shape of a man he adored and friends that would accept him no matter what, he was dragged back in. Bucky had never been free. It was all a horrible illusion of hope. Of the things that he wanted more than anything in the world, but could never have.  
Villains don’t get happy endings, he knew that. Apparently it didn’t matter that Bucky never had control of his actions while he was out murdering people. All that mattered was that he was the executioner, even if he wasn’t the one calling the shots. It was silly for him to think he was ever going to be from HYDRA’s control.  
Every once in a while Friday would check in on him. He made her promise to tell Tony that he was fine. Lies. That he was eating. Lies. That he’d just been watching tv, waiting for Tony’s brilliant idea to fix him. Lies. She didn’t like it, but she agreed. Bucky wasn’t sure why, and he knew Tony wouldn’t be happy about it when he found out, but for now he was just grateful she wasn’t going to tattle on him. Because if she did, he knew someone would be busting down his door in minutes. The question was who would be there first? Tony, Steve, or Natasha?   
Somewhere along the way, Bucky lost track of time. Between staying awake, staring at walls and sleeping for as long as his dreams would allow, he had no phone to keep track of time, and Friday had blacked out the windows for him a while ago. The only thing he knew was he smelt bad and his body wanted food, even if his mind didn’t. So he was mildly surprised when the door swung open without warning.   
At the moment he was sitting in the corner on the floor. His shelf was in pieces on the floor in front of him, along with everything that had been on it. Blood dripped down his knuckles onto the floor below him. His heart sank as he made eye contact with Tony. He could see the disappointment. Bucky felt ashamed. So what if his life was crumpling around him. It was no reason to throw a temper tantrum like this.  
“Bucky?” Tony rushed forward to kneel in front of him. “Baby, what happened?”  
“Hey.” Was all that Bucky could manage. He wasn’t even sure what he could say to him right now.  
“Friday what the hell happened in here?” Tony sounded angry now, Bucky didn’t like it. “I thought you told me he was fine?”  
“Sorry, Sir. Mr. Barnes assured me he was doing ok.” Friday said quietly. She knew she was in trouble, even though there wasn’t much Tony could do to her. He wondered how often Tony had been genuinely mad with his A.I.  
“Yeah well he doesn’t look fine. I trusted you, Friday. You should’ve told me about this regardless of what Mr. Barnes had to say. Has he slept?”  
“Yes, Sir.”  
“Has he eaten?”  
“Not since his mall trip with Natasha, Sir.”  
“Not since-” Tony cut off, glaring at Bucky. “You haven’t eaten in five days?”  
“Five days?” Bucky was actually surprised. He figured it had been three days at most. “Well I guess I need a shower then.”  
“Yeah shower first, then food. Need you in tip top shape for our guest.”  
“Guest?” Bucky was confused. But the way Tony smiled sweetly at him was so comforting.  
“I told you I’d fix your problem. And I’m going to keep my word.”


	21. Chapter 21

Bucky was amazed at Tony’s attitude. He was ecstatic. He kept telling Bucky that they were about to meet a true genius. The fact that Tony was admitting to someone else being smarter than him was a little strange. Tony was the smartest person he knew, besides Bruce. Sure they had different interests and strong suits, but Bucky figured they were more or less on the same level. The way they talked and worked together was amazing. Bucky couldn’t imagine the man that would be smarter than them.  
Yet as suspicious as he was that this wouldn’t work, Tony’s attitude was really starting to rub off on him. He couldn’t be fully excited though. Everytime he looked at Tony’s eye, his heart panged in his chest. It wasn’t swollen anymore, but it was still a nasty shade of purple that made Bucky feel sick. So whoever this was and whatever their plan was, he needed it to work.  
Walking into the lab, Bucky was slightly confused. A group of people stood in the center of the room. A man, a girl, and what looked like two body guards flanked them. Bucky recognized the man as the Prince that blamed him for his fathers death. No, not a Prince anymore. Now he was a King, and apparently smarter than Tony. Bucky was impressed.  
“Tada!” Tony said gesturing to the group of people.  
“Your majesty.” Bucky said awkwardly as a greeting. It was his first proper interaction with royalty, and he and the King didn’t exactly have the best history.  
“It is great to see you again, Sergeant.” The man’s accent was thick. “I am sorry it isn’t under better circumstances.”  
“Well I’m glad you’re here to help.” Bucky said. The King may have started his journey trying to kill Bucky, but now he was going to save him. He was eternally grateful, even if the King didn’t actually succeed. Bucky noticed the shift in body language immediately. It wasn’t just the King, but everyone. He even noticed Tony shuffle from one foot to the other.  
“Actually, he’s not. I am.” The young girl standing next to the King told him. Bucky was confused. She was just a child. “My Brother is an idiot.”  
“Shuri!” The King looked offended.  
“T’Challa!” Shuri mocked her brother. Bucky just stared at them.  
“I’m confused.” Bucky told them honestly. This wasn’t what he had expected when Tony said he would fix him.  
“Tell me, Sergeant Barnes, is it my gender or my race that you have a problem with?” The girl’s face transformed into a sour glare.  
“Both.” Bucky told her honestly. “But I wouldn’t say it’s a problem. It’s just sometimes I forget how far the world has come. And you look so young. I’m amazed.”  
“Come so far, yet we still have so far to go, Sergeant.” Shuri’s face mellowed out, clearly she was pleased with his answer.  
“Please, Miss, call me Bucky.” Bucky stuck his right hand out to shake, which Shuri ignored, instead reaching for his metal one.  
“It’s Shuri. Not Miss. Like you said, I’m young. Although you may call me ‘Your Highness’.” She told him, inspecting his arm with the same look in her eyes that Tony got the first time he got to see the arm close up.  
“Do not feed her ego like that, Sergeant.” T’Challa said, nudging his sister with his elbow. Then he nodded towards Tony, “It’s bigger than his.”  
“Genius’s are allowed to have big ego’s. Its sort of a package deal.” Tony chimed in. He was practically glowing. “Clearly hers isn’t big enough for someone so smart. Don’t worry, Sweetheart, I’ll help with that.”  
The chemistry between them was strange. Tony seemed completely enamored with Shuri. He was hooked on every word she said. The duo started with scans, his arm, his head. They were speaking in big terms that Bucky didn’t really understand. All this technology was so new. Bucky just sat around, enjoying the was the two flew around the room, tapping on holograms, modifying and adjusting their plan.  
“Alright. I’ve got what I need. Ready to go, Bucky?” Shuri smiled down at him.  
“Go? Go where?” Bucky panicked. He thought since she was here, she could fix him here. He didn’t want to leave Tony. And he hadn’t seen Steve and Natasha in days. They’d be worried. He owed them an explanation at least. “You can’t help me here?  
“You are funny. Mr. Stark doesn’t have the technology I need here. His stuff is a little too primitive for my tastes.” Shuri laughed, and surprisingly Tony did too. It was an obvious insult, yet Tony didn’t seem to mind. Bucky couldn’t imagine a lot of people got away with trash talking Tony’s lab.  
“She’s right, Babe. Besides she said I can see all her toys!” Tony was positively giddy. So Bucky agreed. He was nervous, but he would do anything to make Tony happy. Before they left, Bucky pulled Shuri aside for a private conversation.  
“Listen, I didn’t mean to offend you earlier.” he told her in a quiet voice. “It’s just back in my day… Well, ya know. Someone with a mind as brilliant as yours was only allowed to come in one body type.”  
“Yes. And in your day love only came in one form too. But times change, I’m glad you aren’t stuck in the forties.” Shuri just smiled and nodded towards Tony, who was currently begging a guard to see her weapon, with unyielding results.  
“Me too, Your Highness. Me too.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys, I've been busy. Take this.

“Shuri, Wakanda is beautiful,” Bucky said in a slightly louder than usual voice, to make sure King T’Challa heard. “But not as beautiful as you.”  
It had become somewhat of an inside joke between Tony, Shuri, and him. Saying how great something was, but how much better Shuri was in comparison. It annoyed T’Challa to no end. So obviously they loved doing it any time he was around. Of course it was true though. Wakanda was beautiful. It was absolutely stunning. Bucky didn’t think he’d ever seen scenery like it. Maybe they would even be allowed to visit under better circumstances.  
But as beautiful as Wakanda was, Shuri was better. Not in a weird way. She was like the sister Bucky never had. She was a beautiful mind. A beautiful soul. And a spunky little kid with an attitude for days. She and Tony connected on an intellectual level, whereas she and Bucky had a little more…fun. Mainly harassing the King. Bucky hadn’t felt so young in ages.  
As they got things ready, they tried to explain it all to Bucky. Pretty much all he really cared was that Shuri’s ‘algorithm’ would fix him. He didn’t really understand how it worked, but she was confident that it would work. If that was good enough for Tony, then it was good enough for him.  
“So basically you put me to sleep, do a little hoodoo magic, and I wake up fixed?” Bucky asked Shuri after she had gone into great detail about the procedure.  
“Hoodoo? Is that because I’m black?” She feigned anger. “Just because you don’t understand something doesn’t mean it’s magic. This is science. Some of the best.”  
“The very best.” Tony agreed. In the days that they had been in Wakanda, Tony had seemed happier than he had in a long time. It was like a child set loose in a toy store. His smile was so beautiful, it made Bucky’s heart beat faster every time he saw it. If Shuri’s cure worked, he would spend the rest of his life trying to make Tony smile. It was the least he could do for someone who’s given him so much.  
When the day finally came that Shuri had everything ready, Bucky didn’t exactly know how he felt. On one hand, he fully trusted Shuri and Tony. If anyone could figure it out it was them. Well, Shuri. Tony was just there to cheer her on, and occasionally double check some work. And yet, Bucky didn’t understand how they could do it at all. It felt so surreal. But it was worth a shot.  
She had him change into a pair of white cotton pants, and she insisted he wear no shirt. Bucky didn’t really understand why. But who was he to argue? Shuri left the room to ‘check on something’, but he really knew she was just letting him and Tony have a minute alone together before he went under. For a while they just stood together in silence, just enjoying each others company. Finally Tony leaned his head onto Bucky’s shoulder.  
“It’s going to work, right?” Bucky asked, suddenly overwhelmed. He had kept their contact to a minimum since he basically tried to beat Tony’s face in. Just being so close to him now made him feel tingly all over. Out of nervousness and excitement.  
“Absolutley. I think.” Tony sighed and looked up at Bucky. “Alright, listen. This is our best chance. But if it doesn’t work, we’ll figure something else out. I wont stop trying until we get it right. Promise.”  
Such dedication. Bucky couldn’t help but lean in and give Tony a kiss. Soft, slow, sweet. They hadn’t been together for long, but Bucky could feel himself falling for Tony hard. Before he could think of anything to say in reply, Shuri burst through the door with a smile on her face.  
“I cant wait any longer. Its time!” She said, practically bouncing with excited energy. How could Bucky doubt someone so sure of them self?  
“Ok. Let’s do this.” Bucky said, hoping in to the cryo machine. Usually he hated being in there. But somehow this one was almost comforting. Maybe it was the crisp clean new equipment. Maybe it was the promise that this machine brought. She strapped him in and closed the glass. He closed his eyes, feeling that numb feeling of forced sleep wash over him. Just before he was out completely he heard Tony say something.  
“I hope he likes his surprise!”


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's ya update. If it takes this long again, harass me for it. Sometimes i need a little nudge. Ive been working on a couple more stories.

It was a feeling he couldn’t describe, being in cryostasis. Somehow this time was different though he couldn’t exactly put his finger on what it was. He thought he heard voices, mainly Tony, but he couldn’t understand what he was saying. Bucky didn’t know if he was imagining it or not. He had never heard voices while he was asleep before. Maybe it was because he had always been alone. Whether it was real or not, it was comforting. That was the only thing he really remembered, because the next thing he knew, he was waking up.  
Everything was too bright. His eyes screamed in pain until he shut them again. It took him a few seconds to realize where he was and what was happening. He was with Tony and Shuri getting fixed. Hopefully. Since he was awake, that must mean they did all they could. Whether it worked or not, he wasn’t sure. The thought made him queasy.  
“Bucky?” The thick, beautiful accent caught his attention. He opened his eyes and squinted, making out the blurry figure of Shuri. “Are you with us?”  
“The lights.” His voice came out rough and gravelly. He needed water. As if someone was reading his mind, he saw the shape of a glass come at him out of the corner of his eye. It was gone in three big gulps. Luckily the lights had been dimmed by then.  
Bucky looked around and noticed he was in a sort of hospital bed. It wasn’t what he was used to, but he wasn’t sure if that was a new-age thing or a Shuri thing. It was white and clean and sanitized, so at least that was the same. Shuri stood next to him, staring intently. She looked thrilled, so he took it as a good sign.  
Tony was standing slightly behind her. He looked so bad that Bucky wondered if he had gotten any sleep at all while Shuri worked. How long had Bucky been in cryo? He knew a few pressure points that could forcibly make Tony got to sleep, but decided against it. He was sure the man was just worried. It was incredibly sweet.  
“So.” Bucky wasn’t quite sure what to say now. “Am I fixed?”  
“Well we have to test it out. But I did everything I could.” Shuri sounded hopeful, which made up for the dismay Bucky felt. By testing it, she probably meant using his trigger words. He knew it was the only way to find out, but that didn’t mean he was happy about it. Bucky would make sure they locked him up first. He wasn’t going to risk hurting anyone ever again.  
Bucky went to place the cup on the bedside table, but froze when he saw something unfamiliar. His arm was gone. In its place was something entirely new and beautiful. Black and gold replaced the silver he had grown accustom to. He flexed it, watching it respond the same way his other arm had. While he hadn’t noticed the change at first, it was all he could feel now. It was lighter, easier to move. He grabbed the blanket between his new black fingers but dropped it immediately when he felt the cotton.  
“What?” He was in complete shock. Thinking he was crazy, he touched his metal hand with his normal one. His breath caught in his throat at the sensation. He could feel with his new hand. “I can.. It has feeling?”  
“Surprise!” Tony’s voice was weaker than usual, but his face was shinning brighter than Bucky had ever seen it before. That smile was absolutely breathtaking. “Do you like it? We worked so hard on it. It wasn’t easy, even for a few geniuses.”  
Bucky couldn’t think of any words to say. He just kept fiddling with his new hand, touching and feeling everything within reach. Slowly he realized it wasn’t exactly the same as using his real hand. It was hard to describe. He could feel the pressure, but not the texture. It was amazing. Bucky was sure he could cry if Shuri and Tony weren’t in the room.  
He half listened as Shuri started explaining things to him. The only thing that he actually absorbed was that his new arm was made out of Vibranium. That word stuck out because that’s what Steve’s shield was made out of. The rest was sciency and possible side affects of her treatment. He didn’t care about that. The excitement of his arm still hadn’t worn off. He was dying to try it out.  
Bucky didn’t know if black and gold was Shuri’s color choice or not, but he loved it. It was the exact opposite of the silver arm HYDRA had made him. He couldn’t thank her enough, but he tried his hardest. Next he would have to thank Tony, and he could think of several dirty ways he was going to do that.  
Shuri also told him that his arm didn’t ‘feel’ so much as it ‘sensed’ things there. Whatever that meant. He was just happy for the new sensation. Tony had promised him a surprise, and he pulled through. Bucky knew he couldn’t make up for it, but he was wiling to try. But it would have to wait until they got back.  
Apparently Bucky had been in Cryo for almost two weeks. No wonder Tony looked like shit. After that, Shuri had kept him in bed for three days before he truly woke up. Then she waited two more days before letting him leave, wanting to keep him for observation. Being gone almost three weeks wasn’t ideal. He knew Steve was going to kill him for not saying Goodbye first. That was unless Natasha didn’t get to him first.


	24. Chapter 24

“Natalia, please, that arm is new, don’t break it off.” Bucky begged the redhead. Currently she had both of his arms twisted behind his back. One mildly hurt, while the other just felt slight pressure. It was amazing.  
“Yeah I see that, Barnes. Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving?” Her voice was cold and demanding. He knew her well enough to know she was using that as a shield. It upset him knowing that he was the reason for her being sad.  
“Cuz I didn’t know?” It was a weak excuse, but the truth. With one last painful twist to his real arm, she let him go. Bucky turned around to see a very angry looking Natasha. “Come on, lighten up. I’m home.”  
“You’re lucky. If anything happened to you I would’ve killed you.”  
“It’s nice to see you care enough about my life to kill me.” Bucky told her and pulled her in for a quick hug. He knew he would have to tell her about his whole suicide plan eventually, but it could wait until after she forgave him for running off for a few weeks with no notice.  
“Steve isn’t going to be as forgiving as I am.” Natasha told him as she nodded towards the gym. Bucky was dreading having that conversation. He knew he got off easy with Natasha, though he doubted that luck would extend to Steve. “He’s been broody and moody the whole time. Not even Sam can get him to crack a smile. I’m pretty sure he’s going to kick your ass for not telling him you left, then kick Tony’s ass for not bringing him along.”  
“The least I could do is let him win. I think I owe him that.” Bucky meant it as a joke. It was a long running thing between the two men, who was stronger. Sure Bucky had always won when they were ‘enemies’, but Steve had never really been fighting back since he found out the true identity of the Winter Soldier.  
He and Natasha parted ways at the gym doors. After a minute he realized this was as ready as he was ever going to be. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and strolled in. It took Steve a few seconds to realize he was there, then everything happened in slow motion. First, Steve just stared, as if Bucky was a whole new person with his new arm. Then, Steve closed the distance between them to pull Bucky into a hug. Finally, he felt himself being forcefully shoved away as soon as Steve was done clinging to him like he had been brought back from the dead.  
“What’s wrong with you? Cant say goodbye? No call? Not even an explanation? I had to call every single one of Tony’s numbers before I could get a hold of him.” Steve’s face turned different shades of red the more he yelled. It would’ve been comical if Bucky didn’t feel pure shame instead. “Then he gave me some half-assed explanation. Now you’re here, with a new arm. He said they did something to your brain? You cant keep taking off like that. I cant keep losing you, Buck.”  
Bucky had never thought about it that way. Again and again Steve had lost him for one reason or another. This time it was all Bucky’s fault. Steve was right, Bucky should’ve let him know he was leaving at the very least. Especially since Bucky hadn’t even been sure if he was going to make it back or not.  
“You didn’t lose me, I’m right here. But, if it makes you feel better, I’ll let you kick my ass. I wont even fight back!” Bucky dodged the slap only because he had been expecting it.  
“You’ll let me? You think I can’t?” The anger in Steve’s eyes was slowly being replaced by something a lot more playful. It was a good start.  
“You’ve never been able to before, punk.” Using Steve’s old nickname left an ache in Bucky’s heart.  
“Never had a reason to. I think this counts as a good one.”  
“I’d say so.” Sam said, standing a few feet away. Bucky hadn’t noticed him before. He stood there with his arms folded across his chest, looking disappointed. It was always how he looked at Bucky. “I had to deal with his whiney ass the whole time you were gone. So after he gets through beating you up, you should go out and get me a fruit basket or something. I didn’t sign up for super-soldier babysitting.”  
“It comes with the job!” He was definitely going to get Sam something for keeping Steve from going crazy for nearly a month, though he wouldn’t admit to it right now.  
“The only thing that comes with the job is kicking bad guy ass, and right now that’s you.”  
“That’s fine, I can take both of you at once.” He told them confidently. As Steve and Sam rolled their eyes, Bucky took that as his opportunity to sprint full speed back out the door. He could take them both at once, he was sure of it. He had done it before, he could do it again. But when they caught up to him later, he would use his new arm as an excuse. ‘I don’t know how strong it is yet’ and ‘I wouldn’t want to accidentally hurt you guys’ and his personal favorite, ‘It’s new and I don’t want to scuff it.’ Bucky could see the laughter in Steve’s eyes and he knew it would take time, but they would eventually be fine again.


	25. Chapter 25

“Come on, Bucky, don’t you think you should wait a little longer?” Steve asked him for the millionth time.

“Shuri said it was fine. It’s not like swimming, I don’t have a certain wait time.” He told Steve as Natasha strapped him into the chair. “Besides it’s been almost a week since I woke up. I think it’s time.”

Steve just grumbled in reply. They had been fighting about it for a day, but Bucky wasn't relenting. It was time to see if whatever Shuri had done in his brain had truly worked. Steve thought it was a bad idea and kept fighting him on it. Tony also thought it was a bad idea, but reasonably he knew it needed to be done, so he kept quiet for once. Bucky may have been arguing with Steve standing next to him, but he was eyeing Tony on the other side of the room. The man looked just as exhausted as he had in Wakanda. After this Bucky was going to make him sleep. If he couldn’t wear him out sexually, he was going to have to find a pressure point and make Tony sleep. There was no point in fixing Bucky if Tony was just going to drop dead of exhaustion soon after.

“I’ll be fine. I’m in good hands.” He told them all. Each of them had wanted to be the one to test it out, but Bucky decided on letting Natasha do it. It only seemed right. That way if something went wrong she could shut him down. Natasha looked utterly unfazed, though he figured she was just hiding whatever she was feeling. She didn't like the idea of purposely waking up the Winter Soldier, but it was the only way to know if he was free of HYDRA. So she strapped him to a chair inside another room designed from the same glass that could apparently contain the Hulk, just in case.

As she ushered them out Steve had enough decency to blush and look away when Tony leaned down to catch Bucky’s lips on his own. Tony didn’t say anything and Bucky was grateful. He didn’t want to be emotional for this, he just had to hold onto the thought that it would work.

For an eternity Natasha stared at him, silently begging him to change his mind. Steve and Tony were outside the room, waiting by the door for Natasha to run out if anything went bad. Even if he did turn, he should be able to hurt his new master. No matter what, Natasha would be safe.

“Ready?” She asked.

“No, but lets do it anyways.” The smile he gave her was weak.

“Желаниe” Longing. A burning sensation settled in the pit of his stomach.

“Pжавый” Rusted. The nausea was rising up.

 

“Семнадцать” Seventeen. The same anger and sickness he always felt when they called out the Winter Soldier was washing over him.

“Рассвет” Daybreak. If he felt the same as before, did that mean the Winter Soldier was forcing his way out? 

“Печь” Furnace. Or maybe he had always been scared and angry when they used these words, even if he hadn’t always remembered why.

“Девять” Nine. Bucky forced the bile to stay in his stomach. The last thing he wanted to do was vomit everywhere.

“Доброкачественные” Benign. The sweat beaded down his forehead.

“Возвращение домой” Homecoming. He wouldn’t look at any of them. Tony didn’t need to see the fear in his eyes.

“Один” One. Bucky didn't want to risk seeing fear plastered to Tony’s face.

“грузовой вагон” Freightcar. Bucky held his breath. And then nothing. Bucky could feel all eyes on him. For a split second, he waited for the Winter Soldier to take over. But it was still him.

“Солдат?” Natasha asked after a moment. She didn't look afraid, she looked ready to take control of the Soldier she had expected to come out.

“Wow.” He found himself saying with a smirk. “I’m so not ready to comply.”

Natasha was on him in a flash, hugging him tightly before she started undoing his restraints. All the anger had been flushed away and replaced with relief. Steve and Tony stepped in the room, both seeming happier than they had all day. Steve gave him a brief hug, telling him how glad he was that it worked.

“I’ll have to thank her myself.” Steve told him. Bucky was going to have to talk with Shuri soon, too and let her know that it worked. He would make sure to thank her a trillion more times, though it would never be enough to show her how grateful he was. After so long, he was finally free. HYDRA no longer controlled him. The Winter Soldier couldn’t loom over his head anymore. Now he was just back to being Bucky.

The only thing that could slightly dampen his mood was the way Tony seemed to stand at a distance from him. It crushed Bucky’s heart even though he knew Tony must have a good reason for it. Steve and Natasha congratulated him for a little bit before realizing Bucky was too wrapped up staring at the hollow look on Tony’s face. They said their goodbyes and made excuses of having other things to do. Finally, once they were gone, Tony faced him.

“So how do you feel?” Tony asked him in a quiet voice.

“I think I’d feel a little better if you cheered up, Doll.” Bucky took a step closer to him and was relieved when Tony inched closer, too.

“Sorry. Just a little tired.”

“Yeah no kidding. When’s the last time you slept, Tony?” Bucky was running his hands up and down Tony’s arms, reveling in the way Tony practically purred at the sensation. It had been nearly a month since they had touched that much. Bucky had been terrified he might unknowingly hurt Tony again, but now with the reassurance that the Winter Soldier was gone for good, he was having a hard time keeping his hands to himself.

“I would assume you mean for longer than twenty minutes at a time, but I don’t think you’d like the answer to that.” Tony’s eyes were closed now, letting his body lean into Bucky’s. He wrapped the smaller man into a tight hug and squeezed him. The alien sensation of Tony in his metal arm made him giddy. It wasn’t the same as being able to truly feel Tony, but it was more than he had been able to do before. Shuri’s handiwork was truly amazing.

“Come on, it’s bedtime.” Bucky told him, stepping back, but linking his fingers with the other mans. “Walk on your own or I’ll have to carry you again.”

Tony grumbled about it, but followed Bucky back to Tony’s bedroom. Bucky wasn’t sure if his own room was still trashed from his meltdown or if Tony had it cleaned up and fixed while they were gone. But either way, TOny’s bed was better for both of them to be in. It was bigger, softer, and smelt like Tony, so Bucky always liked being in it.

He could see the confusion on Tony’s face when he made the man take off his clothes and lie on his stomach. Of course Tony had been expecting them to do something sexual. For someone in their forties, Tony was always horny. Even when he desperately needed to sleep instead. There would be plenty of time to do stuff tomorrow, or whenever Tony woke up.

Tony’s skin was warm and soft on Bucky’s fingers. He rubbed soft circles into the flesh, frowning at all the knots in Tony’s shoulders. So tense. The noises coming from the smaller man were downright sinful.

“That feels nice.” Tony said finally. It was supposed to be relaxing. It was Bucky’s way of trying to get him to go to sleep. Though now he was beginning to see that it was a mistake. He could see the way Tony’s hips lightly bucked into the mattress every time he let his fingers dig into a particularly sensitive spot on the mans back. Plan B, then. Wear Tony out sexually.

Bucky pulled the blanket down, exposing a completely naked Tony. His fingers trailed lower and lower, massaging every inch of flesh as they went. When his hands finally cupped Tony’s ass, Bucky was hard. He was drawn to Tony’s ass like a magnet. Perfect, round, soft. Bucky couldn’t help but lean forward and place a kiss to the back of his lovers neck, then one below that, before he trailed a line of soft kisses down Tony’s spine, ending with a soft little bite to Tony’s left asscheek. He smiled at the soft chuckle that came from the other man’s lips. His hands went back to kneading and massaging thighs, legs, and feet. Just enjoying the way that perfect body squirmed in front of him, letting out soft gasps every now and then followed by a moan every once in a while. It was driving Bucky crazy. With one hand he kept rubbing at the soft skin below him and with the other, he awkwardly shuffled himself out of his constraining underwear. Gently, Bucky let his cock rest on Tony’s thigh. Once the smaller man realized what it was, he perked right up.

“Well Hi to you, too.” Tony said, reaching down, trying to grab hold of Bucky’s length. Bucky just swatted his hand out of the way, ignoring the grumble he got in response.

“No touching.” He leaned in to whisper, before pushing Tony’s thighs together and climbing on top. Straddling the back of someone’s thighs wasn’t an ideal position, but it was perfect for what he needed. Just right for letting his cock rest on Tony’s ass. Slowly, he rocked back and forth, enjoying the soft skin below him. The more noises Tony made, the more Bucky wanted to just spread him open and ram himself in. But not yet. Thankfully Tony broke first.

“Bedside table. Top drawer.” He sounded so breathless that it made Bucky wonder if he could hold out long enough to get Tony to beg and plead. Probably not, though he would be holding onto that idea for another time. The amount of sex toys that Bucky had never seen before was almost shocking enough to make him stop in his tracks. But again he had to shake his head and keep focused on his goal. Lube. Bucky had to read the label of three different bottles before he finally found the right one.

It was cold on his fingers, which is why he made sure to warm it up before going anywhere near Tony’s hole with it. Comfort and pleasure is what he was striving for. He made sure to use his real hand. He wanted to feel all the warmth and tightness Tony had to offer him. Tentatively at first, Bucky reached out to touch him. A shiver, a gasp. He wasn’t even inside the other man and he was already killing him with those noises. This wouldn’t last long and he hoped Tony felt the same way or things would get awkward soon.

Circling, pushing in, stretching. It must’ve taken a long time, but for Bucky it happened in the blink of an eye. Time really does fly when you’re having fun. The sweetest sound in the world dragged him back to reality. Tony was up on his knees, hair starting to mat to his face in the places where it was long enough to, mouth parted and a look of pure bliss plastered to his face. Bucky had four fingers inside of him, working him open. If he was being honest with himself, Tony was opened up enough, now he was just having fun turning the smaller man into a mess. And Tony was a mess, a hot mess, babbling beneath him. Whining, gasping, clutching at the bedsheets, Tony had clearly had enough teasing and grabbed himself in one hand and started stroking furiously. The whine Tony made as Bucky withdrew his fingers was music to his ears.

“Bucky.” Tony’s eyes landed on him, hazy and unfocused.

“I said no touching, Doll.” Bucky’s eyes were glued to where Tony still had a hand wrapped around his cock. Immediately he let go, fisting his fingers into the bedsheets before waving his ass back at Bucky. It worked. In a flash Bucky was grabbing that perfectly plump ass and lining himself up. Before he could ask if Tony was ready, the man was already pushing back, letting himself slide onto Bucky’s cock. Even with all the prepping Tony still fit around him like a glove. A tight, warm glove.

He would’ve loved to say it lasted a long time. Hell, he would’ve liked to say it lasted a decent amount of time, but the truth was it had been a very long time since Bucky had done that and it showed. Thankfully Tony was equally pent up. It was all over in a few minutes, but Bucky was in heaven. Even after he had cleaned himself up a little and laid down with Tony, he was on cloud nine. But the best part was the way Tony cuddled up to him afterwards and finally got the well deserved sleep he desperately needed. The last thought that crossed his mind before sleep claimed him was how lucky he was in finding someone like Tony when life had taken so many precautions in trying to prevent it from happening.


End file.
